The biggest holiday -- that isn’t in the United States calendar -- is coming up on Friday. As holidays go, it’s pretty lame. You don’t get candy or gifts, you don’t get to take off work or school, and the damn thing only happens once every four years. Also, it’s one of those holidays that’s either celebrated jubilantly while rubbing it in everyone’s faces or mourned while drinking a lot and glaring at anyone who dares to crack a smile. Yes, I’m talking about Inauguration Day, and I’ve got some tips for how to celebrate it if you’re pretty sure the world ended on November 9th.

Attend a march! There are lots of marches going on. I think there’s at least one in every major city, but the biggest and most important one is happening in Washington, D.C. I’d encourage you to attend that one. It’s got the largest amount of attendees and will probably have the most media coverage, so if you want to mouth “Hi, Mom” while waving a sign that says ‘Love Trumps Hate,’ that one’s your best bet. Alternatively, you can go to the one in the nearest major city, just in case you aren’t rich and able to drop everything to go peacefully protest.

Don’t buy anything. Significantly less than half the voting population is excited to celebrate Inauguration Day, but since people are in the business of pretending that the truth didn’t happen and that lies are just facts who have drunk a little too much, it’s a good idea to make your unhappiness as clear as possible. One way to do this is to not buy stuff. As certain people are fond of reminding us, one of the great things about our country is that it runs on buying and selling stuff. To communicate your displeasure on Inauguration Day, start by bringing our economy to a brief grinding halt and watch as your local representatives scramble to blame it on China.

Stay home. If you can’t attend a march, the next best thing is to not attend anything at all. This ties in with the last tip in that they’re both related to bringing our economy to a grinding halt. We’ve spent quite a bit of the last four years watching certain people simply refuse to show up and govern. Let’s put them on the other end of the stick and see how they like it. It’s not petty. It’s just playing the game. Also, this tip conveniently ties in to what a lot of people have been wanting to do since the election results were finalized; stay home, do nothing, and bemoan your lot in life. Let yourself do it. After all, Inauguration Day comes but once every four years.

Refamiliarize yourself with your favorite revolutionary propaganda. Are you a fan of dystopian fiction? If so, you’re probably horrified right now, because this looks like the start of every dystopian world ever. Now’s a good time to re-watch "V for Vendetta," reread the "Hunger Games" novels, or learn all the words to “Do You Hear the People Sing” from "Les Miserables." It’s not escapism any more. It’s research.

With that in mind, try not to let Inauguration Day get you down. Just remember; it’s one day, it happens every four years, and it might be the beginning of the end of life as we know it. Fight the man!