I know, I know, you’re probably thinking about "Dance Moms." Even though in the actual competition dance world dance teachers aren’t brutal and there is no “pyramid,” some elements are true. Competition dancers do spend hours on end in the studio practicing the same dances until they’re deemed acceptable for the stage. Performers do vie for a front row spot (and to the one who says they don’t care even a little bit, we know you do). Weekends are spent in a convention center in tiny costumes, waiting to be judged individually while simultaneously being compared to everyone else. After spending the majority of my childhood as a competition dancer, I recognize now that it taught me so much more than how to put on fake eyelashes. When I graduated and decided not to pursue dance any further, I appreciate this even more so. So as my old competition studio travels to weekends full of costumes, trophies, and judges’ critiques, I realize just how much those competition weekends changed my life forever. So, to competitive dance, this thank you note is for you.

Thank you for teaching me how to manage and prioritize my time.

“I can’t, I have dance,” was pretty much my motto growing up. This is nearly every dancer’s reality, and lots of weekends and “off-days” are spent at the studio. Yes, it sucked missing a few football games, but, dance was important to me, so I never really complained. The people I danced with were true friends, and they “couldn’t because they had dance, too.” Dancing made me realize just how precious time was, because after your three-hour rehearsal having three tests and a quiz the next day was pretty daunting. Without competition dance, I would’ve never learned how to utilize every minute of my day in order to get everything done (yes, I was that girl studying her notecards on the treadmill during finals week). Sometimes I don’t know how I used to fit everything in, but I managed and have excellent time-management skills now because of it.

Thank you for teaching me that I am not always going to be the best, and that’s okay.

Remember the mention of dancers being upset when put in “the back?” Yep, that was me. I spent my fair amount of time in the back row worried that none of my friends coming to my performances would be able to see me. I was never the most flexible; I never had amazing balance. In my younger years, this was the “worst thing ever” (thanks for listening to me complain, Mom), but by the time I graduated I realized that no one can always be in the front. No person has the exact same strengths and weaknesses as another. Through competing for that front row spot and against other teams, I grew to understand that winning everything would not be fun. I learned to admire and applaud the girls that won first overall's instead of being unsatisfied with my own award. The struggle to succeed and the triumph accompanying a win represented a rewarding journey; an easy first-place was never as satisfying. On a personal level, I learned that I can only work with the body that I have. My weaknesses caused me to fail sometimes but that’s OK. As I stepped out of the studio and into the real world, I recognize this holds true more than ever. Dance taught me that I can only be the best version of myself, and when I fall short to shrug and move on. Competition dance is criticized for making young girls insecure, but without dance I don’t think I would’ve ever truly understood or appreciated my ability or who I am.

Thank you for teaching me that hard works pays off….

It took me three years to move up into the company that I wanted to be in. It took three years of stretching constantly, never skipping a class, and private lessons. This process was mentally and physically exhausting, but I will never forget the way that I felt when I saw my audition number right where I wanted it to be. Dance was the place I struggled most in my life; many other things came to me naturally. Without dance, I don’t think I would ever realize just how necessary it is to work hard for what you want and how amazing it feels to achieve your personal goals.

….. even though sometimes it doesn’t seem like it.

As stated before, it took me three years of hard work to move up in that company. Each of those years, I prayed I was “good enough” to belong on the team, and believed I deserved a place. I had worked incredibly hard, so why didn’t I seem to get anywhere? Through disappointment, I learned that life’s unfair first hand. It’s sometimes heartbreaking, but things aren’t always going to work out even if you’ve worked to what you thought was the best of your ability. This was incredibly foreign to me beforehand; in school, when you studied hard you got a good grade. Every time I didn’t make the company, I was motivated (or frustrated with my body) enough to work harder the next year, and longed to prove to my peers and teachers that I was ready to move up. Honestly, half the time I think I was more trying to prove to myself that I was good enough; I wanted to know that I was doing something right. Nevertheless, if you asked me at that time, I would’ve never thought that I would look back on this memory fondly. In the end, I'm thankful I didn't advance those years as failure led me to discover my ability and tenacity to work. I channeled my strength through pain, and as I move more into the away from dance competition towards competition for a career, I know that even though things may not seem to work out I can push on and be successful. Besides, if I’ve done it before, I can do it again.

I knew I would miss taking the stage after deciding not to continue dance in college, but upon graduation I didn’t truly understand how much bigger dance was than just an after school commitment. These invaluable lessons I learned in the studio are ones I’ll cherish forever. For all these things, I look past all of the blood, sweat, tears, and have to thank competitive dance for making me who I am today.