Comparison is something I've wanted to write about for a long time because it seems to enter into my mind just about every day.

I compare myself to my husband.

To girls online.

To my friends.

To my in-laws.

To just about everyone who steps in my life.

And the envy that has sprouted out of this comparison, it is this that is giving me no life.

I know that there are millions of articles out there telling you that comparison is the thief of joy and that it's no good for you to look at others to gain your own worth. That you are beautiful and loved and unique and have so much to offer just as you are. But I feel like one more won't hurt. It's a reminder that I need literally daily, so here's your daily dose.

When we compare our lives, our faces, our hearts, anything in us, it ends up creating a separation. We draw a line between us and them and declare, you versus me. We become two separate competitors after the success in performance of approval. And before you know it, we have isolated ourselves into a small, lonely circle because we have drawn so many lines.

It grieves me to see that our individualism has created such a competitive space in today's world, that we are not seeing people as our counterparts, but rather as our competition. Someone's success somehow seems to threaten our own.

I would argue that comparison is heavily involved with two things. One being pride, and the other being acceptance. We compare ourselves to somehow prove or validate our value and contribution. We size ourselves up to the rest of the group, determining who could be a threat to our status. And we envy those who are in the temporary spotlight of money, success, recognition, or attention.

And isn't that funny?

Comparison starts with us.

For some reason, I have had this idea floating around in my head that it's the other person's fault. That there's a scoreboard up for all to see, and they have sauntered onto my turf. They have come to challenge me with their prettiness, their grace, and their success. Instead of viewing them as a person, I view them as my contender, and then I have the audacity to think it's their fault.

But the reality is, people are just living their life. And they are made up of beautiful things, as are you. They are being a person. They are seeking out friendship and acceptance, joy, and success, as are you. People aren't living to sabotage your reputation or to steal away the people who love you. Their life goals are not to destroy your own.

And if they are, what a horrible reality to live in. A constant up and down. A chasing of the winds of popularity that offers no security or true delight. They are drowning in something that will never satisfy. And regrettably, this is what I bite into sometimes. I move after the wind of affection, attention, and respect. My psyche has created a scoreboard, and I begin to count the greenest grass on someone else's lawn.

And so, here is the conclusion and the hope. Contentment is a practice and art of thankfulness. An art of genuinely accepting and rejoicing in what you have been given in your talents, your gifts, and your experiences. It is choosing to root for those beside us, and to root for ourselves in genuine desire to see happiness become realized in us both.

It is reminding yourself of the value that Christ has deemed on you.

"Because you are precious in my eyes, and honored, and I love you" Isaiah 43:4

Allow your eyes to fall from the scoreboard, and believe that you are loved, beautiful, and unique. No one could replace you. You are you, and you have significant gifts to offer others. Practice thankfulness for what you have and thankfulness for what others have as well.

Rule over the temptation to allow envy to bubble as you naturally compare your life to someone else's. Be thankful for the sweetness growing in someone else's life as well as your own.

I can't assure you that you're perfect just the way you are because you aren't. You are human. We are complicated, messy, sometimes awkward, and unfortunately, mean sometimes. And yet despite all of those things, we are also such a beautiful labyrinth swirling with significance, intelligence, art, perspective, and experience to offer.

Stop comparing yourself, darling, you are special.