Today, October 11, many celebrated National Coming Out Day, a day where the LGBTQ+ community bands together, by sharing our coming out stories to the world, in hopes to reach the ears of others in our community that may be scared, feeling alone, or so much worse.
Being a part of the LGBTQ+ community can often be a very scary reality. I will never forget the first person I came out to. His name was Roger, and he was the person who answered the national suicide prevention hotline.
I was maybe 14 at the time, and it was the first time I ever even called that number. I was so scared that I was shaking. What if my mom found out, what if my friends found out. I still remember the chill in the air on that mid-November night. I was in just a sweater, pacing in my backyard far away from my house as possible, so no one could hear what I was talking about, or who I was talking to.
The second I said "I'm gay" for the first time to a person, I uncontrollably cried. My journey to true acceptance and self love was far from over at that moment, but this was the first step I had ever taken towards accepting, and loving my whole self.
For the next 10 minutes, while I was crying, Roger shared how proud he was of me. He told me that I gave him hope for a better future, he told me of all the amazing activism that was going on, and how the world is so much closer to accepting the LGBT community. He told me how thankful he was that I called him instead of doing something unthinkable, because LGBT teen suicide is unfortunately an epidemic worldwide.
After that night, I never spoke to him again. I don’t know where he is today, but I know that he changed my life. He was the first person I ever told my truth to, and he was the first person who I got to authentically be myself with.
Today, I am proud to say that I am out to the world, and unapologetically myself everywhere I go. I have joined organizations like the Jewish Queer Youth (JQY), an organization that helps, advocates, and educates Jewish LGBTQ+ people, through workshops, events, social workers, and community. I have helped friends come out to their families, and been a confidant for those who needed a supporting and confidential ear.
Know that you are not alone, and there are so many people who do, and will love you for who you are, no matter what. If you are feeling depressed or having suicidal ideation please reach out. You can also call the National Suicide Hotline anonymously at 1(800)-273-8255.
Below are some powerful speeches by incredible people who have decided to live their truths. Some are speeches of solidarity and love from allies. Some are from people who have decided to share their truths, and live their own, authentic selves.
Ellen Page
Coming out.
Memorable Quotes:
"I suffered for years because I was scared to be out. My spirit suffered, my mental health suffered and my relationships suffered. And I’m standing here today, with all of you, on the other side of all that pain. I am young, yes, but what I have learned is that love, the beauty of it, the joy of it and yes, even the pain of it, is the most incredible gift to give and to receive as a human being. And we deserve to experience love fully, equally, without shame and without compromise."
"I’m here today because I am gay. And because… maybe I can make a difference. To help others have an easier and more hopeful time. Regardless, for me, I feel a personal obligation and a social responsibility."
Wentworth Miller
Coming out.
Memorable Quotes:
"I had a complicated relationship with that word, 'community.' I've been slow to embrace it. I've been hesitant. I've been doubtful... I wasn't born in this country. I didn't grow up in any one particular religion. I have a mixed race background, and I'm gay."
"I thought, let me be to someone else what no one was to me. Let me send a message to that kid, maybe in America, maybe someplace far overseas, maybe somewhere deep inside, a kid who’s being targeted at home or at school or in the streets, that someone is watching and listening and caring. That there is an ‘us,’ that there is a ‘we,’ and that kid or teenager or adult is loved, and they are not alone."
Evan Young
Coming out.
Speech starts at 3:35
Memorable Quotes:
"You may have already suspected this, but I hope this does not change your opinion of me: I am gay."
"When I was writing this speech, I was endlessly debating with myself whether I should reveal [that I'm gay], on account of how divisive an issue this is and how gay people tend to be stereotyped, and I thought that, if I did, I should repeatedly apologize and beg you guys not to think any differently of me. But then I realized: I don’t have to. I shouldn’t have to. If there’s one thing I learned at this school, it’s that we can still be friends even if we profoundly disagree with each other."
Connor Franta
Coming out.
Memorable Quotes:
"I felt like a mixture of every emotion possible. I was really relieved that I finally said it, but I was also so terrified, that I finally admitted that to myself."
"They just said: okay. Like it was no big deal. This whole thing, that I had built up inside of me, to be this huge deal for 22 years, wasn’t."
Troye Sivan
Coming out.
Memorable Quotes:
"This is not something I am ashamed of, and it's not something that anyone should have to be ashamed of.
"We hugged and I asked him I was like, ‘dad, do you still love me?’ And he looked at me like I was absolutely crazy and said, ‘yes, of course, I still love you’. And that was that."
Ingrid Nilson
Coming out.
Memorable Quotes:
"I'm gay. It feels so good to say that."
"I want to live my life unapologetically because I am proud of who I am. And I’m not going to apologize for who I am anymore, this is life that I’ve always lived in my head and now, its real"
Jussie Smolett
Coming out.
Memorable Quote:
"There is, without a doubt, no closet that I've ever been in, and I just wanted to make that clear."
Zach Wahls
Speaking on growing up with two mothers.
Memorable Quotes:
"The sense of family comes from the commitment we make to each other, to work hard through the hard times so we can enjoy the good ones. It comes from the love that binds us. That's what makes a family."
"In my 19 years, not once have I ever been confronted by an individual who realized independently that I was raised by a gay couple, and you know why? Because the sexual orientation of my parents has had zero effect of the content of my character."
Pink
Speaking.
Memorable Quote:
"Forget all the politics, forget everything. This is not about laws to me. This is not about who does what, who dresses this way, who says this. It's about love. It's about who your heart tells you to love, straight or gay."
Anne Hathaway
Speaking about her family, and the normalcy of having a gay brother.
Memorable Quotes:
"In my household, being gay was, and is, no big deal."
"When [my brother] brought home his first boyfriend, now husband, home for a couple of weeks one Christmas, my father's only comment to my mother was, 'please, try not to mix up our underwear'."
Lady Gaga
Speaking at a gay rights protest.
Memorable Quote:
"We must demand full equality for all. They say that this country is free, and they say that this country is equal. But it is not equal if it is some times."
