I’ve been celebrating Christmas twice, once with my mom and once with my dad, for several years now, and while my holidays have been different from my friends’, they’ve also been pretty great. There are some things that I’ve missed out on, but I’ve also gotten to do a lot of things that most people don’t. There are some obvious downsides, such as the fact that I don’t get to have my whole family together for the holiday. However, there are also obvious upsides, such as the fact that I get to celebrate multiple times. There are other things, though, that also have to be considered.
Scheduling time around the holidays is difficult for all families, but it’s especially challenging if both of your parents want to spend a lot of time with you. Since my parents divorced, my siblings and I have been celebrating with my dad on Christmas eve and with my mom on Christmas day. This is a great compromise because it means that we get ample time with both of them to partake in all of the festivities. It does pose an issue, though, when one parent feels that their time has been cut into by the other one. Over the years, I’ve had to learn to balance time with both of them, so that neither feels cheated.
One upside to having one or both of your parents find a new significant other is that you sort of get to be a part of another family. This is is especially fun around the holidays because it means that you get to be around even more people and share with them the happiness that the season brings. It does usually add an additional celebration that you have to fit in, but it also allows you a chance to spread Christmas cheer further than your immediate family.
A challenge faced by divorced couples with children is how to handle their Christmas gifts, specifically what each parent is going to get for the children. This can result in different arguments depending upon the people, but regardless of what the fighting is about, the kids can tell. It makes them uncomfortable with the holidays, and can put a strain on how much they enjoy the Christmas season. Fortunately for me, my parents loved my siblings and I enough to make sure that we were never present for these discussions, instead solving such issues without letting us know anything was going on. Because of their care in doing so, we were able to enjoy everything Christmas had to offer, without any worry about whether our parents were having difficulty with it.
Things are even more complicated for me because I have a younger half-sister with whom I don’t always live. That makes it harder for us to enjoy all parts of the season together, but we manage by being extra Christmas-y together and having a ton of spirit when we get to be with her.
My Christmases are far from traditional because of my family situation, but we make it work. My parents and the rest of my family ensure that we still have grand celebrations, and we have so much holiday spirit that nothing can get rid of the magic of this season. It’s a little more difficult for us than some others to plan our holidays and prepare for them, but we always figure it out, and because I’m surrounded by so many loving people, my Christmases are, in my opinion, more amazing than anyone else that I know.
