While brainstorming topics for this article, I decided that this was a good time to talk about my faith. You see, my faith is something that is very important to me. I was born into the Catholic faith and what most people call a "cradle Catholic." However, there was a part of my life that we as a family didn't go to church on a regular basis. As a kid, I always thought that as long as I believed in God and made good decisions then I would still go to Heaven. While my parents did send me to religion every year where I learned about God for an hour every week, I always felt out of place because I didn't know the prayers that everyone else seemed to be able to recite from memory or the bible stories that seemed to be common knowledge to all the other students.
It wasn't until I began taking confirmation classes my junior year that I really starting to really "feel the fire" of the Holy Spirit. As cheesy as that statement sounds, it is true. Honestly, I felt so close with the Lord once I completed the classes and became an adult in the Catholic Church. It was a rewarding feeling and really exciting. I finally understood what all the hype was about.
However, like everything else in the world, it takes work to feel that great all the time. As humans, we are going to have good days and bad days, and it is impossible for us to not sin or mess up from time to time. Once confirmed, I still went to church every Sunday, but as time went on, I notice that I was losing that “fire.”
My first year of college was probably the worst year of my life. I never showed it to anyone because the people who were close to me always seemed like they needed me to be strong and happy. So, I put up this front for everyone, but I was angry and annoyed with everything in my life. I was still going to church, but I wasn't listening. My faith was at an all time low, but it wasn't because I was mad at God or anything like that. I tried doing everything on my own, became overwhelmed, and didn't know how to fix it. So, I guess you could say God fixed it for me.
One day, my friend was telling me about how she was preparing for Steubenville South, and I asked if there was any way that I could go as well. For those of you who haven't heard of it, Steubenville South is one of many Catholic conference put on for a weekend in the summer for high school students. My friend and I helped on the service crew, which is a group that helps with all the setup throughout the conference. After speaking with the head of service crew, my friend told me that I could sign up, and the next thing you know I was spending a week in Alexandria for a retreat for service crew and the conference during the weekend.
Once I returned home, I was feeling the fire again, but also a nagging thought in the back of my mind pointing out the fact that this feeling would probably go away again. Then, I made the decision that I wasn't going to let it. That week honestly saved my life, at least it did spiritually. After that week, I could see changes in my life. My confirmation teacher had put a message on Facebook asking for help with the new class. So I signed up. My mom told the head of the religion classes that I would be willing to help as an assistant teacher (as an education major it would be a good learning experience). To my dismay, a seventh grade religion teacher was needed, and I took on a class of 12 children who expected me to know everything there is to know about the Catholic religion (it was a learning experience for all of us, and made my Mondays enjoyable). I even began to focus on being more positive. I actually felt happy and continued to feel happy.
So, I am here a year and half later, on to my second year as a religion teacher and confirmation helper. I went back to Steubenville this past summer (obviously), and again had an amazing yet completely different experience than my first year. I do have my bad days, but I'm still pretty positive on those days. I'm happy I was brought into this world as a Catholic, but I'm even happier with my decision to continue living as a Catholic. This article was not with the intention of changing other people’s minds about whether or not they should be Catholic, but more to tell my story. Now with that being said, if you aren’t Catholic or at least not a believer in God, then I think you are seriously missing out.
My Steubenville Family
