I am a "people pleaser." No matter how hard I try not to be, I just am. A lot of the things that I do revolves around me making other people happy, which I am not saying is a bad thing. However, I am saying that it isn't necessarily a good thing.
I can't even begin to count how many times I have given up something I love or have chosen to do something to make someone else happy rather than doing what truly would make me happy. I was always under the impression that choosing my happiness over another person's was selfish. I felt that if I didn't do what made others happy, no matter how unhappy it made me, that I wasn't being considerate of other people's feelings.
This was my mindset for the longest time; throughout high school and even going to college. Honestly, the pressure of it all made me feel as if I was bound in chains.
But I never should have felt this way.
Yes, making other people happy is a beautiful thing. It is a wonderful feeling when you know that you are the reason for someone's smile. But if creating the smile on another's face results in you losing your own smile, then it isn't worth it.
Choosing your happiness over someone else's is not selfish.
Our happiness correlates with our mental health. If we consistently allow our self to be unhappy for someone else, then we are putting our own emotions and mentality at risk. It is important to take care of our selves first, and choosing to be happy is a huge part of that.
We deserve to live the life that we want.
If you choose to do something that someone else has set for you, whether that be where you go to school or your career choice, over what actually makes you happy, then you aren't putting your life in your own hands. It is our life, and we deserve to live a happy one. If you want to be an artist instead of working in an office but people keep steering you in the opposite direction, take the steering wheel for yourself!
You are the only one who can lead to your destination of happiness.
Making other people happy is a great thing and I still strongly believe in that, but I am beginning to learn that making myself happy is just as important.
This is a cruel world that we leave in and we can't expect others to be as kind as we wish to be to them, so if we constantly choose their happiness, then who is going to choose ours?
Your happiness is important, and choosing to be happy over anything else is important.
The next time you have to choose between pleasing someone else and pleasing yourself, choose you.
We have the potential of a long life. We shouldn't have to live it miserably.