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If You Are The Type Of Person Who Gives Your Friends The World, It Is Best You Choose Wisely

We are at the point in life where it is so much more important to have a few close friendships than it is to have many shallow ones.

Abbey Brandt

May 07, 2019

UCLA

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If You Are The Type Of Person Who Gives Your Friends The World, It Is Best You Choose Wisely

Abbey Brandt

A few years ago, one of my closest friends stopped talking to me. She just stopped. When I asked why, she simply said, "You have too many friends." Too many friends? Seriously?

I didn't really understand what she meant until now.

I focused so much of my energy on saying hi to everyone, meeting everyone, impressing everyone, being friends with everyone. I was so focused on establishing these surface-level relationships that I didn't have the energy to dig deeper.

Think about it this way: you have a bucket filled with a finite volume of water and 10 smaller, empty buckets. You can choose to fill each of these with a small amount of water, or you can opt to fill 3 of them to the brim. The same goes for relationships; if you divide your love and energy amongst all you meet, you will be left with several friendships hanging on by threads. If you choose instead to give your all to a few, you will reap the benefits of a select number of strong, unbreakable bonds.

Which will you choose?

As I said, I have a history of choosing the weaker option. I'd like to make it clear that I wholeheartedly regret this. I wish I had the heart to let some friends go, and the strength to hold others a little closer. I guess what I'm trying to say by sharing this with you is to avoid making the same mistakes I did:

1. Stop wasting your energy.

Why continue to exhaust yourself over something that doesn't make YOU happy? If you give everything you have to someone and it's not reciprocated or they walk away, at least you have the peace of mind in knowing there was nothing else you could have done.

2. Fights are healthy.

Every friendship will be challenged by disagreements at some point. Don't let that scare you away; these miscommunications and arguments only prove the strength of bonds that don't break under pressure.

3. Quality over quantity.

It's rare to find friends whose presence just makes you happy to be alive. If you find one, two, or a few of those people, don't let them go. If they make you happy, why look further?

4. Don't forget to say "I love you".

Your friends need to know you appreciate them, just as you need to know they appreciate you. Maybe straight-up saying "I love you" isn't your style and you'd rather give a pat on the back or send a "drive safe" text. Regardless, remember to remind those special people just how special they are to you.

5. Nurture the friendships that help you grow

The best relationships - platonic or romantic - help you find your best self. You should never feel like a friendship is degrading your character, morphing your morals, or changing your behavior in any way other than what you feel is right. Plant your roots in whatever it is that keeps you seeing the sun.

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.

Lifestyle

Cool Off with These 8 Beers!

North Carolina State University

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Summer is hot and humid, and it's almost like summer was made specifically to drink the refreshing, cold, crisp wonderful, delicious, nutritious nectar of the gods. Which is none other than beer; wonderful cold beer. With summer playing peek-a-boo around the corner while we finish up this semester, it's time to discuss the only important part of summer. And if you haven't already guessed, it's beer. There are few things I take more seriously than my beer, in order are: sports... and beer. Here are my favorite summer brews:

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New England Summers Are The BEST Summers

Why you should spend your next summer in New England.

Saint Joseph's University

5668

www.flickr.com

Three years ago, I chose to attend college in Philadelphia, approximately 360 miles away from my small town in New Hampshire. I have learned many valuable lessons away from home, and have thoroughly enjoyed my time spent in Pennsylvania. One thing that my experience has taught me, however, is that it is absolutely impossible to beat a New England summer.

You cannot beat the beach. Believe it or not (which many people may not), New England has a long and beautiful coastline. Most of my high school summers were spent sitting on the Wall at Hampton Beach, getting sunburnt and eating Acai bowls from The Secret Spot. The Wall was the place to be both during the day and at night. We begin our days there with a KB's bagel and coffee, and end them with pizza and ice cream. It’s not a New England summer without that 4 p.m. text from someone, “Who wants to meet at the Wall tonight?” Nighttime is for Tripoli’s Pizza, the sound of waves, and wishes on shooting stars. Wednesday nights are especially important, as those are the nights that Hampton Beach sets off the weekly firework display.

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If You Are The Type Of Person Who Gives Your Friends The World, It Is Best You Choose Wisely

We are at the point in life where it is so much more important to have a few close friendships than it is to have many shallow ones.

1. Stop wasting your energy.

2. Fights are healthy.

3. Quality over quantity.

4. Don't forget to say "I love you".

5. Nurture the friendships that help you grow

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Cool Off with These 8 Beers!

Coors Light Summer Brew:

Leinenkugel Summer Shandy

Leinenkugel Sunset Wheat

Sam Adams Summer Ale

Hell or High Watermelon

Blue Moon Summer Honey

LandShark Lager

Corona

75 degrees and sunny, plus, no humidity. I mean do I really need to say more?

Perfect Weather

You'll get an effortless tan

You can exercise with a view

You don't have to worry about bug bites

In n Out all day, every day

We have outdoor concerts

We live where people vacation

Because let's be honest, we all use lyrics.

1. “Don’t get too close, it’s dark inside. It's where my demons hide.”

2. “Tonight, we are young.”

3. “Cuz I may be bad, but I’m perfectly good at it.”

4. “Tell me how they got that pretty little face on that pretty little frame.”

5. “I can’t wait to fall in love with you, you can’t wait to fall in love with me.”

6. “Sweatpants, hair tied, chillin with no makeup on.”

7. “Why you so obsessed with me?”

8. “We ain’t ever getting older.”

9. “I didn’t know that I was starving until I tasted you.”

10. “Didn’t they tell you I’m a savage?"

11. “I’m gonna make you miss me.”

12. "Cheers to the freakin weekend.”

13. “Love’s a game. Wanna play?”

14. “You don’t know about me, but I bet you want to.”

15. “Let’s set each other’s lonely nights, Be each other’s paradise.”

16. “Trippin’ on skies, sippin’ waterfalls."

17. “Wish we could turn back time, to the good old days.”

18. “But you will remember me for centuries.”

19. “Something about you makes me feel like a dangerous woman."

20. “Don’t act like it’s a bad thing to fall in love with me.”

21. “Darling, I’m a nightmare dressed like a daydream.”

22. “Find me where the wild things are.”

23. “I’m high on lovin’ you.”

24. “If you’re gonna be somebody’s heartbreak, somebody’s mistake, if you’re gonna be somebody’s first time, somebody’s last time, be mine.”

25. “Don’t be afraid to take the road less traveled on.”

Everything Bruce says in his classic rock songs.

1. "Talk about a dream Try to make it real You wake up in the night With a fear so real Spend your life waiting For a moment that just don't come Well don't waste your time waiting." (Badlands)

2. "It's a town full of losers/ I'm pulling out of here to win" (Thunder Road)

3. "You've got to learn to live with what you can't rise above" (Tunnel of Love)

4. "I got something in my heart/ I been waitin' to give/ I got a life I wanna start/ One I been waitin' to live" (Leah)

5. “God have mercy on the man/ Who doubts what he’s sure of” (Brilliant Disguise)

7. “Is a dream a lie when it don’t come true, or is it something worse?” (The River)

Why you should spend your next summer in New England.

Want to know more about summer destinations?

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1. "Talk about a dream
Try to make it real
You wake up in the night
With a fear so real
Spend your life waiting
For a moment that just don't come
Well don't waste your time waiting." (Badlands)