Gravel spat out from under the tires of my family’s van as it backed out of the driveway. I watched as it turned on the highway and faded from my view. With dread, I turned back toward the house, and stared at the door. Somehow, I needed to force myself to reenter the house. How could I? Being one of the quietest members of my large homeschool family, I was naturally shy. Now I had to force myself to walk back up the porch steps and into the lives of my host family.
Taking a deep breath, I climbed the stairs and entered through the kitchen door. I was greeted by screaming children running through the kitchen, dinner on the stove, and a husband and wife busily chatting away. As I entered, the husband turned towards me and faked a gasp of surprise, “You’re still here!” He exclaimed. I managed a small, very nervous, smile.
That day was the beginning of my life in a house I would call home for the next year and a half. What began as an uncertain and skeptical housing arrangement turned into an experience that would change my life forever.
Entering my freshman year of college, everything was new to me. While I had expected the normal life of a college student: living in a dorm, eating at the cafeteria for every meal, being on campus 24/7, I soon learned that God had something different in store for me.
It began with my senior year in High School, when I met this young family praying outside Planned Parenthood in downtown Pittsburgh. A family of five children, they were just recently moved to the Bloomingdale area in Ohio, and he had a job teaching at Franciscan University. When I told him I was planning to apply at this college, he whipped out his business card and said, “If you ever need help, let me know.” I accepted the business card, never thinking I would ever need it.
Seven months later, I had been accepted to Franciscan University. I was buying dorm room supplies and notebooks. Then I heard back from the college. All the dorm rooms were full; I had to wait until the spring semester to attend. I was crushed. I was planning to start the next step of my life, to take my first real step into adulthood. Now, I wasn’t going? What was supposed to do now? My dad’s answer: pray.
For the next 2 months we prayed something would open up. Several days after I had been told there were no dorm rooms left, my dad called me.
“Do you still have that business card that young Doctor gave you?”
“Yes.”
“Email him.”
It was a long shot, but we were desperate for any help that could be given. I emailed him, explaining my situation as best I could, and asking if there was anything he could do in the situation. He responded very shortly after by saying, “My wife and I have an extra room in our house. We have five children, so it’s not the quietest spot, but you are welcome to come live with us.”
With that, our prayers were answered. But I was blown away, and continued to be blown away for the next two years. What kind of people open up their home to a total stranger? How do they take it upon themselves to let a young adult move in and influence the lives of their children?
Once, when I asked the mom of this family, she responded by saying, “You are a Catholic homeschooled girl we met praying outside the Abortion Clinic…I didn’t think we had anything to worry about.”
But this wasn’t just about opening up their home to a stranger, this was about accepting a stranger as part of their family.
For the next year and a half, I was a part of their family. I ate every dinner with them, went to Sunday Mass with them, babysat, taught the kids how to sing, read stories to the toddlers, put kids to bed, did dishes, went on walks with the boys. I was a big sister to the kids, and yet also a little sister to the young parents.
Every evening, I would get to sit with a mug of tea in their kitchen after the kids all went to bed, and just talk to the parents. We talked about life, they gave me advice on college, on dating, on paying off loans, on ways to raise kids. As they still had young children, and were now living in the country, they asked me questions about going through 12 years of a homeschool curriculum, and what it was like growing up on a goat farm.
Everything I learned from this family has influenced who I am today. While I didn’t understand why God didn’t want me to live in a dorm, be on campus, and constantly around college students, I now look back on that time as one of the greatest blessings in my life.
It took a great leap of faith, both on my part and on theirs, and we all knew it would change our lives. For me, it brought me out of my shell, it helped my faith life to put so much trust in God, it helped me seek out as many ways as possible to repay this family for their kindness, even if that meant doing small things like doing the dishes and holding the baby. It taught me there is no end to how much charity you can offer to a person.
I learned the lessons every young adult should learn when discerning the vocation of marriage. By watching the husband and wife interact, I learned the importance of marrying your best friend. By watching how they raised their children, I learned how committed I have to be one day as a mom. By going to Mass with five children, I learned the patience it takes to get through and still receive the grace. Through my experience, I was able to stand outside the parameter and just observe how to live as a Catholic family, how to be the best person for your spouse, and what it really means like to live out that marriage vocation in a day-to-day life.
Although I don’t live with them anymore, they still continue to influence my life. I still keep in touch with the family, and the lessons I learned from them continue on even today. That we never stop trusting in the Lord, and if He asks us to take that leap of faith, we do it. When we see someone who needs help, we don’t just fulfill their needs and move on. That’s like having a Catholic checklist, where we’re basically saying, “Alright, I did my Christian duty today. Check.” No, we go beyond that. This family went above and beyond the call of duty. They didn’t just open up their home to me, they invited me into their family, they molded me into a better student, a better Catholic, and a better individual in the advice they gave and what they taught me each and every day.
