I attended a private catholic school from preschool until senior year of high school. A logical progression would be to attend a Catholic college. However, when I was applying to colleges, I did not apply to any Catholic institutions. In the end I chose Smith College, one of the most liberal colleges in the country. The summer before I came to Smith, I was nervous about where I was going to live, what the food was going to be like and how hard my classes would be. In a place where many students proudly discuss their various identities, I never thought I would be nervous about my religious identity.
I remember the first Sunday I was at college. I woke up early, walked about a half a mile, and went to an 8 a.m. mass at St. Elizabeth Ann Seton Parish. When I returned, all of my friends were still asleep and I was back in my room before brunch even started. I realized that I could regularly go to church without anyone knowing that I had left. Though this would have been the easy way out of addressing my fear of judgment from my new found friends, I decided to be open with not only others but also with myself. The practice of any religion or beliefs should not be something to be embarrassed about.
When I mention to people that I am coming from or going to church, I receive a variety of reactions. These reactions range from a normal acceptance from the people who know me best to an utterance of shock from people that I am only slightly acquainted with. I have found an overwhelming number of people who admire me for going to church and practicing my religion when my parents are not there to make me do so. This remark, though never surprising, always catches me off guard. I have a strong foundation in my faith that I am working to maintain while also being an everyday college student.
Finding a balance between practicing my religion and living on my own at college has been one of the most challenging adjustments that I have made in the last year. While I do not think of it as a chore, it is something that I must regularly think about. Throughout my childhood, I never thought much of making time to attend mass. This was simply because, in the Catholic community that I grew up in, nothing was scheduled on Sunday mornings. In the hectic life of a college student, I must plan which mass I am going to attend based on my schedule for the day to work around meetings, sporting events and exams.
Though I identify with my Catholic background, it is not to say that this is my only defining characteristic. Along with this portion of my identity comes a complex individual. Many of my friends who know that I am Catholic and that I attend mass tend to view me as the "Catholic expert," so to speak. I am asked either very personal questions or very general basic questions about my faith. Though it is not exactly a bad thing, it is much different than what I was used to prior to attending Smith. I often remind people that though I am Catholic, my beliefs, thoughts or opinions on a certain topic do not reflect the entirety of the Catholic church. It is important to remember that this applies across the board to people who belong to or identify with any group. Being respectful should always be one's top priority.
I might leave a party to go to bed early enough on Saturday nights to get up on Sunday mornings or I might invite friends to attend services with me on my way out of breakfast, but in the end, it is all a part of who I am.
