Do you ever feel like God is trying to tell you something? I feel like that a lot, and although sometimes I might be overthinking, I think that there are certain times where God is trying to get a message or a point across in my life.
I went to church twice in the past two weeks. Once was on a Wednesday, at a church that I hadn't gone to in a couple of years. The other time was a week before that, on a Sunday, at a church downtown. They both had different priests, both had different gospels, but one thing was the same. Both priests had the same message and talked to us about the same thing--carrying our crosses.
But what does that mean?
We all know the story--Jesus carried his cross before he was crucified. He was tired, it was hot, and it was probably heavier than anything I could ever lift, especially on my own.
But what does it mean to carry your own cross?
I had never thought about this before--looking at my burdens and my struggles as a cross that I had to carry. There are so many things I worry about every day: money, friends, my social life, academics, getting enough sleep, eating right, and so on. I never really thought of all of these struggles and minor inconveniences in life as a cross that I had to carry.
And it is deeper than that, I've realized. We all struggle to identify ourselves, to figure out who were are, why we were put on Earth, and what we were sent to do. I know I personally struggle with that a lot (again, I overthink). However, seeing all of my burdens, issues, insecurities, and daily inconveniences I deal with as a cross I have to carry, it somehow made that weight on my shoulder a little lighter.
Jesus died for me, and you, and everyone--and that cross had more weight (physically and symbolically) than anything I ever will have to deal with in my life, and He did that for us. Although I have a test on Thursday I know will be difficult, and I don't exactly know what I will be doing in the next five years, I know that I can get through it and pull the weight of my cross like He did for us.
I also realized that sometimes my cross isn't the only one I am burdened with. I have carried other's crosses for some time. At times, this wasn't the right thing to do, and at others, I know I was meant to carry someone's cross as they got back on their own feet. I know at times some people help me with mine, and there are points where I was selfish and didn't carry as much weight as I knew I could handle at the time.
We all have a cross to bear, and we all have things to overcome in life. To my friends, my family, and everyone else who may be reading this--you aren't alone, and thank you for helping me carry my cross.
