Are you a woman between the ages of alive and dead? Congratulations! That means your clothing says something about YOU! And don’t worry, it’s not just the self-expression you’d like for it to be – did you really think your choice of clothing could ever be solely a reflection of who you are? Please. Your clothes can tell the world about your age, your self-esteem, and even your level of sexual promiscuity! As an added bonus, they’ll even tell you whether or not you deserve to be a victim of sexual assault. And this all comes for the low, low price of your self-worth (oh – and a pink tax). Anything you put on your body will immediately be refracted through the judgement of everyone around you. In fact, the opinions of politicians, parents, random men, and friends, may in fact distort your own perception so much, that you too begin to think that who you are and what you deserve is reflected in what you wear.
Congratulations.
Congratulations.
Have you noticed? This is a rant about clothing. There are 500 directions this article could go, but with 500 words, I want to return to one phrase from above: your clothes can tell the world about your age.
It doesn’t look like a very remarkable sentence, does it? For a long time I wasn’t concerned by it. But let’s take it for a moment, and unpack it: what are we telling girls when we tell them their age is attached to their clothing?
My clothes, for as long as I can remember, have been attached to my age. How many times have I thought, “why is that girl in that skirt? She’s far too young for it”? How many times have I been told that a dress is a “grandma dress” or that I need “age-appropriate clothing”? Rhetorical question, because it’s happened so often, I don’t know the answer. It happens so often, I never noticed it.
This is, of course, personal observation: I have no academic studies to prove it. There could be ages attached to male clothing, but I haven’t been able to think of any instances. Let’s take formal wear as an example: men wear basically the same thing their whole life, just in different sizes. You’ve got your slacks, your button down, maybe a vest and jacket and a tie. A little boy is going put on a bow tie, and nobody says “don’t you think he’s a little young for that?” An old man is going to put on a button down, and no one is going to say “don’t you think you’ve outgrown that style?”
(There is, of course, judgement, hatred, and discrimination that men can face for wearing “women’s” clothes. A boy in a skirt or dress will face the hatred and fear of people who have deeply gendered notions of what acceptable, manly clothes are. This, is not however, the notion of age being attached to women’s clothing.)
Why have we attached an age to women’s clothes? Why are some outfits more appropriate for children, teens, or adults? Why is the length of a child’s skirt deemed acceptable or not based on age? Why are certain dresses an acceptable style for 5-year-olds, but not for adults?
I’m going to say it comes back to our policing of women’s bodies and sexuality. Clothes have become a standard means of determining the sexual activity and worth of a woman, as well as a way of sexualizing her. If little girls shouldn’t wear too-tight jeans and too-short shorts, it’s because we’ve sexualized those items, and we’ve sexualized them on a woman’s body. It implies a degree of sexuality inappropriate for children. Why are we worried if a small girl dresses like a teenager? Are we afraid she’s becoming a woman too soon? That she’s not old enough for the socially acceptable sexual objectification of a girl that’s gone through puberty?
Women of all ages should be allowed to wear what they love: what makes them feel like the powerful, wonderful women they are. It can be overalls, dresses, pants, bikinis. It is whatever makes them feel like their best self. I want to rock whatever style makes me feel like my most confident, beautiful, dynamic self.
I want everyone else to stop caring.
I am not here for your consumption. I am not here for your judgement. I am not here for your objectification.
And so, I ask again: what are we telling girls when we tell them age is attached to their clothing?
