My younger brother and I are very close. Almost exactly twenty months apart, meaning we were together a lot growing up. We shared the same toys, same room, same baseball team, same friends, same school, same job…same a lot of things. We had our share of arguments, fights and plenty of disagreements over some of the most absurd things. Like the time he tackled me into a bush because I was “being annoying” or the time I made him sign a contract saying we were no longer related because he didn’t want me as a sister (which shortly after signing was followed by him crying and apologizing), or even when he ripped the tail off my most sacred stuffed animal. Aside from all of that, I can truly say I have learned a lot growing up with him by my side. I learned things about myself, about him, and about life in general. Here are five things I learned.

1. I’ve learned the importance of competition.

Competition is good! Every little thing, whether it was a sport, a board game, grades in school, or something a useless as who could balance a book on their head the longest, we made each other better. Always striving to one up the other. Encouraging each other to reach their fullest potential and never give up on becoming better. Giving each other a healthy kind of competition; even if it led to tears and heated disputes, we benefitted from it.

2. I’ve learned to see both sides of the coin.

He’s told me that I can be controlling and well, just plain bossy. When I was young, and still to this day, I catch myself. I would try to take charge and do things my way. I have realized with a brother that there are two sides to every coin. That not everyone thinks the same as you do. That others have a different way of doing things in a way that works for them. Consider that there is always another way of seeing things, because who knows if their way will be better?

3. I’ve learned that your actions don’t go unnoticed.

They notice the good things you do, as well as the bad. They look to protect you, help you, and care for you. They learn from your mistakes, as you learn from theirs. They are happy for you and take pride in watching you succeed. They hold you accountable for your faults. They are one of your biggest fans and supporters, as well as your biggest critics. Even if they never admit it, they miss you when you are absent. (Don’t believe me? College, my friends!). They appreciate you, but won’t always tell you. They look up to you in one way or another.

4. I’ve learned the essence of family.

It’s true, friends will come and go, but you will always have your family. We have really proved that to each other. That even though we argue and even though we do not always see eye to eye, we will always have each other’s back. That we are stuck together for life, and we will always be there for you. Even if we argue, or disagree, we always (well almost always…) find a way to work it out, because family is the most important thing.

5. I’ve learned that there is no other bond like ours.

My brother is my partner in crime at all the family parties. The one who makes me feel wise when asking for my advice. The one who tells me like it is and listens to me complain about everything and anything. The one who’s seen me at my worst, even those terrible awkward stages, and has accepted me for who I am. The person I can bug to escape from my boredom. The person I can count on to make me laugh. My first and my best friend that I will always have.

Thank you to my brother, for being such an important part of my life and helping me shape into the person I am today and strive to be everyday. It’s been a blessing growing up with him, of course I would never tell him that because I am still the evil older sister, but needless to say I would be totally lost without him.