I'm bossy. I am fully aware of my bossiness and my take-control attitude. Sometimes I even have Kelis' "Bossy" playing in the back of my head. I don't like it, though, when people mean it in a bad way.
Merriam-Webster defines bossy as "inclined to domineer, dictatorial, liking to order people around." When I first read this particular definition, I didn't think it was very accurate. I was actually very annoyed. Why is the word "boss" seen as such a good thing when the adjective "bossy" is defined in such a negative light? This is the definition young girls refer to when they are called bossy for exhibiting leadership skills amongst their peers. This is the definition I grew up with, what my mom grew up with, even my grandmother grew up with. Yet, this is not what I think of the word at all.
The word "bossy" has a bad reputation. I'll be the first to admit that the word "bossy" has a negative connotation to it, and the fact that it is usually only used towards women is sexist. It can sound harsh, and is often thrown into conversation for the purpose of being offensive. There's even a petition going around to completely ban the word "bossy." What these people want to do, though, is ban the negative connotation of the word. They want to ban the gender-biased assumption that a bossy woman is not a woman you want to be around, and I don't blame them; I'd like to see the negative connotation go, too. Until then, I'm not going to let any words like "bossy" or synonyms of such bring me down. Here's some reasons why I don't mind being bossy.
It's Practically My Birthright
I'm the oldest in my family, so it's in my nature to be bossy. I lived, breathed, and thrived on being bossy since my little sisters were born. It was my job as a big sister to make sure my sisters listened to me at all times. I have been called bossy too many times to count by now, so for me, I'm not really all that effected by the word. However, for those of you who come from families where you are an only child or are not the oldest, fear not; you, too, can be bossy.
It Insinuates Confidence
Bossy is an attitude, not just an adjective. In the "Ban Bossy" video, Beyonce says, "I'm not bossy. I'm the boss." But why can't I act like a boss and also be a boss? Since when is being bossy and acting like a boss any different? Essentially, the two words both mean the same thing, but the connotations of the words that set them apart. In my eyes, I see the words as interchangeable as they both give me the same effect: in control and empowered.
It Makes Me Unique
Being bossy doesn't mean that I want to be a dictator. To be honest, I don't really like to boss people around in the ways of belittling character or educing dignity. That's not being bossy or boss-like at all, that's just rude. Bossy and rude are not synonyms for each other and should not be treated as such. Why should I settle when I know that something can be even greater? I am bossy because being bossy is knowing that you have the ability to make a greater change and acting upon it. It means encouraging others to do their job by your actions rather than your commands. It means being able to exhibit confidence in an honest and moral way. That's what bossy is really all about.
You will never hear someone call a man "bossy." It's a word that society has deemed solely to be given to a woman. But, a word is what you make of it. It is inevitable that you are going to offend someone with a word or an action. Until bossy has a better reputation, I'm just going to sit here and listen to "Bossy" on repeat.
