It's Time To Breakup With That Toxic Friend

It's Time To Breakup With That Toxic Friend

This is the year about choosing your self-worth over others.

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It's 2019, people! We shouldn't have to keep toxic people in our lives just to "save face" or keep things from being awkward. We deserve to live in a world with little to no toxic relationships, and that starts by letting the people who think and act negatively towards you and others go from your life.

Now that doesn't mean you have to be rude or disrespectful to end a relationship. You can still be civil and nice while also keeping your distance. Toxic friends can suffocate and drain your mental and physical health. The sooner you are able to let go of that kind of relationship, the more you can appreciate the good in yourself and in others.

In a perfect world, this would be easy to do. But unfortunately breaking up with a friend is a lot easier said than done. It's tough letting go of a relationship that meant so much to you for so long. But this is the year of understanding your self-worth and having your emotional, physical, and mental health comes first.

There's plenty of ways to end a toxic relationship, but the hardest and most effective way is to communicate and be HONEST. Lying and excusing why you have to leave a relationship doesn't help anybody. It only softens the blow of an already difficult situation, but it doesn't give any closure to what had happened. Don't be afraid to explain how you're feeling or why things went wrong in your relationship. And don't be afraid to LISTEN to how the other person responds. They might be feeling the same way.

This will be hard. There may be some tears and maybe some anger, but being honest about your feelings can start a conversation about how to heal the relationship and fix what had gone wrong. And if the toxic person in your life does not want to listen or communicate to your honesty, then you know you made the right decision to choose your self-worth over a toxic friend.

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An Open Letter To My Unexpected Best Friend

You came out of nowhere and changed my life for the better.
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“It's so amazing when someone comes to your life and you expect nothing out of it, but suddenly, there right in front of you is everything you ever need."

-Unknown

Dear Unexpected Best Friend,

You were the person I never thought I would speak to and now you are my very best friend. You came out of nowhere and changed my life for the better. I can't thank you enough for everything you have done to shape me into the person I am today. You've taught me what it means to be selfless, caring, patient, and, more importantly, adventurous.

You don't realize how much better my life has become and all because you came out of nowhere. I didn't see you coming. I just saw you on occasion, and now I can't see my life without you in it. It's funny how life works itself out like that. Our unexpected friendship filled a hole in my life that I didn't know existed.

I don't even remember what life was like before you came along; it most likely had a lot less laughter and spontaneity than it does today. I can call you about anything and you would drop whatever you're doing to help me in any situation. You know when I need encouragement. You know when I am at my best and when I am at my worst. You always know exactly what to say.

SEE ALSO: 8 Tiny Lies Every Young Woman Has Told Their Best Friend

I couldn't have found a better friend than you if I tried. We balance each other out in the best way possible. You are most definitely the yin to my yang, and I don't care how cliché that sounds. Because of you, I've learned to stop caring what people think and to do my own thing regardless of any backlash I might receive. You are my very favorite part of what makes me who I am to this day.

It's as if I wished up a best friend, and poof — you appeared right in front of me. I am so beyond blessed to have you and I wouldn't trade the world for all our memories. Thanks for coming out of nowhere.

Love you forever and a day.

Cover Image Credit: Lauren Medders

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Four Quarters Will Always Be Better Than Ten Dimes, And I'm Not Talking About Spare Change

Quality over quantity any damn day.

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"You would rather have four quarters than 10 dimes, 20 nickels, or 100 pennies," is a phrase that at first glance would seem to just be about money. But it actually contains a deeper meaning that could definitely serve as good advice when it comes to the friendships you have in your life.

As an ambivert, I have always found myself happier when I surrounded myself with a large group of friends. It gives you a sense of belonging, something that is a proven innate human desire. Having large groups can be fun, but they also equally have the chance of being toxic for you. There's no point in surrounding yourself with individuals if, at the end of the day, they don't make you happy. Often times you'll hang out with people just because you crave company, but not THEIR company. There is a very important distinction.

Don't let your loneliness or your desire for more friends allow you to be consumed into toxic friendships. Because I have been there and done that. Many times. It's not a fun experience. It took me time to learn, but I have learned the valuable lesson of less being more. When you eliminate extraneous beings from your life, you have more time to focus on your more important relationships and the most crucial one of all, the one you have with yourself.

I am very blessed to say that people that I am close to in my life genuinely care for me and my happiness because this was not always the case. It takes a lot of trial and error, and also greatly impacts your mental health, but finding the right friend group for you is definitely life-changing.

Choose your friends wisely, you don't want a wallet full of useless change.

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