Dear Barcelona,
We can not deny the reality anymore. My time with you is ending. Deadlines always fill me with weepy contradictions: dreadful excitement, purposeful aimlessness, and useful sentimentality.
I feel the study abroad timeline closing in on me like a darkness at the end of my illuminated tunnel. Well, that's entirely too dramatic - I yearn for my people in the US and my dog (who technically is not a person). The classic bittersweet feeling of a conclusion.
Barcelona, don't get me wrong: you're dreamy and I swoon over the idealized concept of ~ t r a v e l ~ like everyone else who is too young and spry to be tired. Barcelona, you're my favorite city. You have delicious food and kinetic architecture and impressive social safety nets for citizens. However, I won't miss you the most; I will miss my friends here and my intangible mindset of gratitude for the word "yes" that I've adopted. Like always, my proudest accomplishments are my relationships. Honestly, I want to continue to apply what I've learned abroad when I return home to alleviate the smack of reverse-culture-shock during re-entry.
Barcelona, you gave me a home in Europe - how blessed am I. Barcelona, you gave me a sense of autonomy at a young age - how novel am I. Barcelona, you gave me an escape - how refreshed am I. The death in my family the month before I left the country was bizarre timing. I still don't know if it was perfect or horrible of me to retreat to you. But your adventure was ambivalent to my situation, and I love you for it.
Barcelona, in a way, you've added years to my life. I've had more experiences here for the past four months than I've had during extended periods of time back in my country. So, yes, my time with you is withering away like sand slipping from my stubbornly clenched fists. For now. I will be back soon. However, I will miss you during our break.
Until we're back together,
Riley