First, you’re always there when I need you. All I have to do is send out a call and you’ll be there, right on my front step, ready to make me smile. Second, you fill a void in my life. Yeah, there are other options out there but nothing comes as close to perfection as you do. Third, you know my desires. Fourth, all my friends absolutely love you. Whenever we get the call that you’re 15 minutes away, everyone cheers and starts getting everything ready for your arrival. And sometimes, they even offer to pay for your ride. And fifth, you’re downright sexy.
But alas, now it’s time for the bad… first, your goodness is not free. It comes at a price and at this point in my life, I have so little to give. Second, you are toxic. There are so many other options and although those options can never be as fulfilling as you, so many of them are healthier than you. Third, too much of you leaves me feeling sick. Yes, I want you every day, every second, but I can’t possibly do that. If I take too much of you, you leave me feeling disgusted with myself. Fourth, my friends love you and I want you all to myself. Except that obviously comes into conflict with my last three points. And fifth, you don’t make me feel sexy.
I’ve tried everything I can think of to ease the pain. I’ve tried to take better care of myself so that I can keep you in my life. I’ve tried to convince myself that our relationship can’t possibly be that unhealthy. I’ve tried ordering side salads, getting a diet soda instead of a regular. I’ve tried going to the gym three times a week. I’ve tried skipping desert. And when I finally see you, I only take one slice instead of six… sometimes two when I’m in at the end of a really bad day. But I am done ignoring the facts. I am done lying to myself and lying to you. At the end of the day, Meat Lover’s Stuffed Crust Pizza with Extra Cheese, you are not good for me. And yes, it's true that no one else will ever be able to make me as happy as you, except maybe coffee, especially that spicy one that Mill Mountain sells… but let’s be honest, you and coffee never really worked well together, did you?
I'm so sorry. I know your intent was not malicious. I know you will always be a temptation to me. And I know you don’t deserve my rejection. But as an intelligent, strong, independent, beautiful, healthy, young woman, I have the right to cut toxic things out of my life. And you are toxic.
