I’ve been to church three times in my life.

Or three times that I can remember.

If I said that sentence to almost anyone in the state I live in, they would be confused. In Alabama, I’ve noticed that going to church isn’t an option for most people. It’s something they’ve always done. They can’t imagine not waking up early every Sunday, getting all dressed up, and leaving for Sunday service. When you move to Alabama, the question isn’t “Do you go to church?” The question is “Where do you go to church?”

Alabamians take their religion seriously. There’s a reason we’re the second most conservative state. and the third most religious state. Anyone who’s traveled north on I-65 has seen the God-fearing signs and know how Alabamians love their faith.

But I never got it. My parents never took me to church nor did the ever really talk about religion with me. Spending the first twelve years of my life in Michigan made me believe that churches were just a thing another structure.

Moving to Alabama taught me that, in the South, churches aren’t just buildings for a weekly gathering; churches are a way of life. The kids I went to school with knew each other from church. They went to religious camps together in the summer. They were members of their church, not just patrons.

I wasn’t like that. Any talk of religion made me uncomfortable. When my eighth-grade teacher would use biblical stories as a comparison to the novel we were reading, I would get very lost very quick. When a class debate took a turn for the religious, I would quickly tune out. Not because I was uninterested, but because I didn’t know anything about the religious contexts, nor did I want to.

Religion is such a dividing topic in American politics today. The Republican party has taken Christianity and made it the battle cry of the GOP. The religious right has taken over on the topics of abortion, gay marriage and Islamophobia. A presidential candidate cannot run a campaign without explaining how their relationship with God will influence their term in office.

The publicity of religion is something that I have a hard time grasping. I never grew up in a place where people openly talked about their faith. Moving to the Bible Belt without that connection to people made me resent religion all together. I remember being a horrible pre-teen who looked down on people who even spoke about their relationship with God. I used to think that people were treating me badly because I didn’t like religion.

But then I realized I had it all backwards: I was the one treating people badly.

Being agnostic is something that I’ve come to terms with. I don’t fully disbelieve in a heavenly power, but no matter how hard I try, I can’t fully believe in one either.

And that’s O.K.

One thing that our political powers and voters need to know is that their specific religion is not for everyone, and their specific religion should not set the laws for everyone. We live in a democracy, not an oligarchy.

Having a connection to a religion is a wonderful experience for some people. Having a relationship with God gives some people a purpose in life. Having a link with people who feel the same way you do about religion gives some people a sense of community and understanding. All of that is wonderful, but it’s just not for me.

And that’s O.K.