Too often, we are expected to be able to read people and understand what someone means from his or her body language and mannerisms. Naturally, when someone decides to deal in subtleties, everyone involved will begin to have issues. But when someone doesn't rely solely upon body language to talk for them, sometimes people will issue what I call "sweet lies" - lies designed to tickle the ear/not offend someone. Here, I will discuss why bitter truths are superior to sweet lies via a list. Warning: you're about to experience total honesty. Reader discretion is advised.
Why I Hate Sweet Lies
1. I prefer not to be deceived. Deception is never good. For one matter, whomever you deceive will likely lose trust in you. Depending on the relationship, whether it is between strangers or close friends, destroying trust can be incredibly destructive to someone, and breaking someone's trust can lead to after-effects.
2. I abhor being coddled. This may take a bit of explaining. People lie to one another for a few different reasons, and one of those is dancing around the feelings of another person. By doing this, the liar coddles the person being lied to, and as a result, the liar communicates his or her thoughts on whomever he or she lied to. In this circumstance, the liar communicates "you're too weak to handle what want to say, and I'd feel bad about hurting your feelings."
For example, if I was a mechanic and I added too little oil to a motor, I'd prefer to be told what I did wrong and how to do it right instead of something like "great job!"
3. Lies are lies. No matter how much of a "white lie" it may be, it's still a lie. And lying is still wrong.
4. Miscommunication. If someone believes a lie to be true, he or she will act as if that lie is the truth. Again, depending on the lie and relationship, the lie complicates matters. I'll continue with the mechanic analogy. For example, assume I put 10 quarts of oil in a motor that is supposed to function on 8. But my supervisor, who knows that the motor in question only holds 8 quarts and that I filled it too much, says something like "good job" instead of telling me so I can fix the problem. What happens? Well, if it isn't fixed first, the motor will be damaged when it's turned on, and it will need to be fixed or replaced, which is costly.
Why I Love Bitter Truths
5. Knowledge.
Obviously, if we relay truthful information to one another, even if it's painful, we can learn from it and adapt. Also, if it's a personal truth, we learn where we really stand to each other and what our roles are.
6. Respect. If someone is told the truth, especially when it's unpleasant, he or she may be upset, but at least he or she knows that "truther" respects him or her enough to tell the truth.
Basically, sweet lies are like candy. They are sweet and seemingly harmless, but too many of them can become detrimental. And bitter truths are like the vegetables some of us hated when we were kids. They taste bad, but they are the best for us.
