Summer is great. The sun shines bright, the water is warm, the breeze floats through your hair. For many, it means no school. For some, it even means no work. For me, summer is the time that I get to chill out, make some extra money, avoid academics like the plague and get a few really painful sunburns. It just wouldn't be summer without doing that stuff. Now, it's early August and I have come to the conclusion that I have wasted approximately three months of beautiful weather. I move back to campus in about three weeks and I still haven't done anything that makes summer, well, summer.
I have not explored any new locations. I have not gone camping, nor have I gone on a hike. I have returned to the exact same places, over and over again: my job, my bed, and my refrigerator. I have not attended a bonfire. I have imagined setting myself on fire for wasting so much time doing absolutely nothing at all. I have not spent a day at the beach, and I have not gone swimming. I did, however, get quite a brutal sunburn, which caused me a large amount of pain for multiple days, peeled, and then forced me to return to my original transparent skin tone. I have not caught up on sleep. I lay in bed every single night for multiple hours with my eyes closed, yet, somehow, I never seem to wake up feeling refreshed. I have not gone on vacation. I have enjoyed the luxurious amenities that my parent's house has to offer. I have not saved any money. I have worked overtime, but also bought a car... Something doesn't seem to add up here. I'm actually starting to believe that small goblins have broken into my bank account in the night and worked their evil goblin magic all over me. There is also the possibility that it evaporated. There is the more realistic option that it could have dissolved completely into government taxes, but I'm betting my last $0.16 that I have been participating in some unconscious online shopping binges. I have not gone to Six Flags, but let's be real- I can barely afford one flag, and you all expect me to be able to afford six!? I have not seen a single friend from home. I have not hosted, or even gone to, a single party. I have not gotten skinny. I have been working on my bikini body since about 2006. Maybe it'll be ready by summer 2018. I have not prepared myself for the upcoming semester, and I have not accepted that in just twenty short days, I will be returning to campus and the stressful, uneventful, sleep deprived life of a full time undergraduate college student. I have, however, finished this article. I am officially accepting suggestions for unexciting ways to spend the remaining weeks of my summer vacation, so leave your ideas below.