I was told you are one to like girls who don't try as hard, or ones that have attitudes. I had talked to one of my friends and she said to take into consideration of what I would want different in between a relationship. I thought maybe I should be less vulnerable, by not wearing my heart on myself, or not being so emotional with the person.

Thinking about it now.. Why should I have to change myself for someone that I would hope to love me one day, the way I am? If someone wants you to be someone else, then maybe I am wasting my time. Just by you not responding, has my mind running a mile a second.

I would have thought you would have wanted something different. From my knowledge, you always seem to go for the people that are going to deceive you. They will not to try to get to know you, the details of the complicated but wonderful life you live. Why would you choose to give someone the ability you to hurt you? I understand when things get out of your comfort zone you push them away, and I am most certainly out of that zone. When I am straight out telling you I would never do something to create distrust and you not responding, is something I don't think I will ever understand. Most people are ones to just say it, but actions speak louder than words.

Given that comfort of knowing that someone is all about you, the details of who you are and what you believe in, is something most desire. But if that is not what you want, then I don't think you are the one I want to call my person. I want someone who will do the same. They will want to want the little things about me, like how I will always let them know how I love them, I will never be one to share a secret, and will always tell me what they are thinking. Being able to communicate will always be the one thing I will crave, due to all the lies that have been fed to me my entire life. The ones that said they'd never leave when things got hard, but they ended up leaving anyway. The ones that screwed with my head, simply because they found it entertaining to hurt someones heart and pride. I just want the one person to prove them wrong. That I am something worth staying around for.

If it's not me, I do hope you do find someone that you will allow them to love you in this way. Someone that makes that smile grow upon your face, who will always find your things since you have a tendency to misplace them, and someone that will love your family the way you do. Most importantly, someone that makes you feel like there is no barrier between you and her.