Being Someone Even If It Scares Me
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Being Someone Even If It Scares Me

Taking Time To Care For People.

Being Someone Even If It Scares Me
Payton Stark

When I think of what I want to be in life, not a whole lot comes to mind. Throughout my life I always thought in simple ways when it came to this question. Ever since I was four all I have wanted to be is a musician, it didn't matter what or how I accomplished this I just had a very simple task I set before myself which was to make music and make music that speaks to and for people. The idea of fame has always scared me and has been quite unattractive to me. The idea of people looking to you for direction or seeing you on a different level than everyone else. I don't want to have a barrier between fans. I want people to know I will be there for them and that I was them once, and I will never forget how that felt.

I don't like the idea of being rich either, money has never really been a huge influence on me. It took me forever to finally get my first job, I don't get excited at the sight of it. I don't know, I just don't really care for it. I figure that if I end up getting too much of it I will have to give it away, or start giving my music away for free. The only thing that makes me want to acquire more than an average amounts of money is to give my future wife and kids the world. I want to do great things but, I guess I just don't care to have my name signed after those great things.

Where do I see myself 15 years down the road? Well, nothing crazy I would love to have a created music that spoke to people and designs that are iconic, even if the audience is the small, yet large world of punk music. I would love to have a roll in reviving punk music using towns that need what the music can offer for them. Towns where perfection is pushed and small thinking is central. Other than that, I hope to have an average suburban home. Nothing too crazy. A wife that is crazy enough to stick around through however many years I live, by my side. Hopefully people can say that they have nothing but the best to say about me past friends and late arrivals. I want to instill values in my kids, teaching them that God is all that matters at the end of the day, and that everyone should be treated with equal respect and attention. That skin color and political backgrounds are just that and that they don't make one less or greater than another. I'm scared to be all these things at the end of the day. All though I don't aim to be much, I fear, not because I don't think I can't do these things or do them well. Just the idea that I will be the only voice to some people, the only husband, the only father. I realize the responsibility I will have and that scares me. It also gives me hope as I can't wait to be the only one for my wife or the only father to my kids, offering me the opportunity to give them what they deserve and love them. To use my platform as a performer and show people I care for them by being on their level and not disappointing them by spiraling out of control. With these ambitions, I know I have the opportunity to fail. But overall, I know that I will give it my all, till I take my last breath. Taking my time to touch every life I come in contact with even when I don't think I have the strength. Letting God hold me while I hold the others around me.

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.

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