Social media has a funny way of documenting our lives in a very public manner. We share our feelings in 140 characters or less. We post pictures for friends' birthdays instead of calling them and telling them, and we Snapchat our surroundings to make sure other people know how much fun we're having.
Open letters have become a major trend on Facebook in the last couple of months, and I can't scroll through my Newsfeed without seeing, "20 Reasons Why My Boyfriend is The Best: An Open Letter", or "An Open Letter to My Amazing Mom". We share them about our dogs, our siblings and our grandparents, captioning it with, "This is so relatable! Love you *insert subject here*!" Then that person comments back with, "OMG that's so relatable! Totally my life!"
While it might be that these letters are relatable, I can't help but feel like I'm intruding on a private moment.
Whether you're reminiscing about a best friend from high school or making peace with an ex, open letters take aspects of a personal relationship and make them public.
Letters and writing have always been meaningful and personal for me, and while the concept of an "open letter" is a harmless trend online, I have a hard time with the idea that we tell people they're important by having them read a generic list.
Social media and technology have created a wall to hide behind in relationships. It's easier to send a text than it is to reach out and call, and in-person communication can have awkward pauses or leave you feeling vulnerable. However, when we lose real communication we lose sincerity. Polishing ourselves for media sounds like a great idea on the surface, but the beauty in relationships is that they're messy.
Open letters are great for sharing something short and sweet, but they aren't actually personal. If I want my mom to know all the reasons why I love her or why my brother is my best friend, I want to tell them myself because the way I communicate that will be different than another person can.
Relationships, whether they be familial or friendly or romantic, are living and breathing and complex. They aren't supposed to be neat and tidy, and they aren't supposed to be relatable. An open letter doesn't do that justice.
I believe the written word should not be treated lightly. I've written letters people have never seen, but I've also spent days writing others because I want to really convey my feelings. When I write, I choose to be intentional with my words because they're worth something.
The best part about deep relationships is that they can't be mass-produced. The goal with these letters might be written to sound as relatable as possible, but that's the thing: my relationships with people I love are as unique as these individuals are, and they aren't applicable to the masses.
If open letters truly convey your feelings, go ahead and share them. However, remember to be sincere and personal in your relationships. Be messy and unpolished, and don't allow social media to become the main focus of your communication.
