A little while back, in the midst of a BuzzFeed video binge, I came across a video that was called “What It’s Like To Be Ethnically Ambiguous” and I don’t think I’ve ever related to a BuzzFeed video so much. It highlighted the way people aim to identify other people by their race, making simple assumptions. Being half Caucasian, half Pacific Islander, it’s hard to identify what race I am.

Living in a state where the majority of people are of Mexican/Latino/Hispanic descent, people generally assume my brown skin means I am alike. It doesn’t bother me to be mistaken for another race, but what bothers me is that people make abrupt assumptions about what you must be. Especially the assumption that there are only two types of people of color. A normal conversation about my ethnicity goes as follows:

Person: So, you’re Mexican, right?

Me: Nope, not at all actually.

Person: Black?

Me: Nope!

Person, now confused: Then what are you?!

When I give them the real answer, then I get the response, “So you’re like, Hawaiian?” to which I always answer, “If I was Hawaiian, wouldn’t I just say I’m Hawaiian?” Now I can’t get too upset because Pacific Islanders make up 0.5% of the United States population (as of the 2012 census) so some people forget we even exist, let alone what Pacific Islanders look like. Being a mix of Caucasian and Pacific Islander just adds to the confusion. This isn’t always a bad thing. Being ethnically ambiguous has come with pros and cons.

A big con of being ethnically ambiguous is that people make assumptions about you before they even know you. Whether they be good or bad preconceived notions, they can be wrong. Being a light shade of brown to some people automatically makes me Latina. They start speaking in Spanish to me, assuming I know how to speak in Spanish. If you don’t speak Spanish, you generally stand there stunned wondering what to do, trying to recall that phrase… How does it go again? “No hablo español?” Or if you’re like me and grow up with white parents, when you’re out in public as a family, people assume you’re adopted. They might not realize it, but we can tell from their sympathetic looks that they think we’re adopted. The biggest con is when racist people assume you’re part of the ethnicity they discriminate against. People are quick to pass judgment without giving it a second thought, and these are the thoughts that become dangerous.

Some of the biggest pros of being ethnically ambiguous come with travel. I generally blend in with locals. If you dress like a local and don’t carry yourself like a tourist, people don’t try to sell you stuff or get you to go on tours. Sometimes they’re nicer too. One time as I was leaving a shop in Greece, I said “thank you” in Greek and the owner lit up to ask me if I was Greek (as I was with a group of Americans). He was very shocked when I said no, and it made me feel a little more confident that he would think I was Greek. Greeks have a strong sense of pride in their culture, and it was nice to feel like I could be a part of something so beautiful because I look the part. When people assume you belong, they’re a lot kinder to you.

It just goes to show that people use to race to identify people. It’s not always a bad thing because personal pride in your ethnicity and culture is great. It’s how the world acquires more diversity and new ideas among new parts of the world. But just be careful when trying to identify the way a person is by how they look. Just because they look Hispanic, doesn’t mean they speak Spanish. A person is always far more than what they look like.