That girl.

You know, that girl.

The one who parades around the phrase, "I don't need a man to be happy," all the while relentlessly criticizing "dating culture," groaning at happy-looking couples and believing in her heart that having a boyfriend maybe would miraculously fix her problems.

Yeah. That girl. You have your own opinions of her. Maybe you think she's pitiful. Maybe you find her desperate. Or annoying. Or maybe you identify with her. Maybe you entirely understand her, and you're crying from the sidelines of her life, "Preach it, sister!"

I can't say that I've been that girl. There’s a lot about that girl that I can’t bring myself to think or say or be. But I can't entirely say that I don’t get her.

I don't need a man to be happy. That's true. But I would be lying if I said I haven't thought since I was young that a boyfriend sure might make me happier. I would be lying if I said that I didn't long for that one person to love me forever and for me to love him back. I would be lying if I said I haven’t thought about it often, even if I don’t bother talking about it out loud. I would be lying if I ever said, "I am sincerely, entirely content with being single." The truth is that I wish I would just meet the guy I will one day marry already. I don’t really want to wait.

Pitiful? Desperate? Annoying? Relatable? Maybe some combination of it all.

Something changed for me recently, though.

I wish I had a dramatic story to introduce this epiphany. I wish I’d learned this lesson from some historically catastrophic first date. Or that I'd met some mysterious wise old woman who imparted advice to me. Or something. I wish I had any sort of story at all to give this revelation any sort of authority or validity.

But I don't. I just sort of had this realization the other day. A bunch of really obvious thoughts suddenly aligned in my mind. And it all ended with me being sincerely okay with being single.

I’ve never really been interested in dating for the sake of dating. That just sounds exhausting. I’ve always hoped that any sort of romantic relationship will lead ultimately to marriage. To me, if I’m going to devote that much time and that kind of attention to one person, I would hope it’s the person I’m going to spend the rest of my life with.

And it somehow hit me recently that that’s just what I’m wanting to rush: meeting the person I’ll spend the rest of my life with.

There are a lot of people in my life now who won’t be in my life forever. I’m in college, and I'm only in this environment for a few more years. There are things that I do every day now that I won’t be able to do for the rest of my life. I’m learning things and having friends and going on adventures and figuring out who I am. I don’t get to say “’til death do us part” to my friends, my classes, my campus or much of anything that is currently in my life.

So why would I want to rush out of this time of my life where I get to pour all of myself into the people and things around me now? Why would I want to waste this time wishing for the thing that will be happening for the rest of my life?

Thinking about it like this, I feel silly for ever being consumed with that longing to find the one person who will theoretically be by my side forever.

I’m not willing away a relationship. I won’t turn my nose if a guy who seems right suddenly turns up. All I’m saying is that, for the first time ever, I wouldn’t be lying if I said that I’m perfectly content with being single.

I’m okay being single. And I don’t feel any need to blast Beyonce or pretend to take pride in some magical "single girl strength” to prove it. I’m just okay with putting off the realm of a romantic relationship for a bit if it means I can fully invest in who and what is in my life right now.

Whether you relate to that girl or this girl right here, I hope this offers you some sort of encouragement. I hope you can see why what you have is enough for you right now. There are people to love and life to live all around you; save the rest of your life for that relationship you've been wanting to rush for so long. I’m hoping that’s enough for you. Because it’s enough for me.