I'm sure there was a time growing up where your mom said no to something you wanted to do, you asked why, and she said, "Because I said so."
How annoying. What a cop out. What a b*tch. She couldn't even come up with a good reason, so you should have been allowed to go, right?
What you didn't quite understand (and probably now know), is that she knew exactly what she was doing. She said no because the answer was no. She didn't owe you an explanation for why you couldn't go, or why you had to go to your room, or you had to just stop being a brat. You had to because she said so, and she knew what was right for you at the time.
We grow into that voice for ourselves. We start saying no to things along the way as we grow and realize our own limits. Maybe it starts with basic high school peer pressure, to college deciding not to go out too often, to even harsher and more serious situations. We say yes and no because we know what we want. We know what is right for us at the time.
We make decisions every day, whether they're serious or not.
We may be adults, but there is still so much to learn about ourselves. One thing I hope we can all learn about ourselves is that when we make a personal choice, we owe nothing to anyone.
You do not owe someone an explanation for why you don't want to drink; you just don't.
You do not owe someone an explanation for why you don't want to have sex; you just don't.
You do not owe someone an explanation for why you changed your mind; you just did.
You do not owe someone an explanation for any choices you make for yourself when you know in your heart and mind that it is the best thing for you.
This life is ours, and the older we get, the harder it is to trust ourselves when we've heard our mothers say "Because I said so!" our entire lives. It's about time we learn to say "Because I said so." and finally speak for ourselves.
You may think you know nothing about yourself or who you are, but neither does anyone else. You know you better than anyone, and you should trust your gut. You're smarter than people have lead you to believe. Be blunt, be bold, and be the best, most unapologetic version of yourself you can be while you have the chance.
