We all focus so hard on finding love for Valentine's Day. Either we have a partner and need to be with them or we get our single friends together and binge watch movies. It's natural. It's not weird to want affection on a day where it feels like everyone else is going to be drowning in it. I'm not saying to not be with your group or see your partner, but this day is meant for all kinds of love. We take the 14th as a chance to spread love to everyone else... but the person who needs love the most is the one who is so often forgotten.
It is ok to love yourself on this day. It is ok to appreciate what there is to love about you, even if you're sharing the day with someone else. I went through some rough patches in my life... many to do with loving myself. I don't ever want to be the girl who loses value in myself again... so I wrote myself a reminder on how to love...me. I hope this resonates with you, too, especially on this Valentine's day.
There will be mornings where you wake up with squinted eyes, judging the sun for shining like it has something to prove. Where you pull on your sweatpants and scramble out the door, with 10 minutes to get 15 minutes away. And maybe you'll spill your coffee or trip on cracks, but remember the mornings you didn't want to wake up at all and look how far you've come.
There will be words whispered across phone lines after harsh fights and unneeded thoughts that will break your heart into more pieces than numbers can count. And you'll go to places in your mind so dark that the bottom of the sea would be jealous. And maybe you won't be ok again, at least not for a while. But remember the time where you didn't know how to love at all and think about how much you could've missed.
There will be days you don't want to remember things but refuse to forget anything at all.
There will be moments, most moments, where nothing will make sense.
And you will break, and shatter, scream, cry.
But remember that you will laugh, and dance, live, grow.
That you will figure out the little things that turn out to be quite large in the end.
That you will find the things that will stick in your brain to make forgetting the rest not necessary at all.
There will be times that you'll forget the things that make you who you are.
But remember when you do, that I'll be there to remind you of all you're going to be.
As Thursday comes and goes, take a minute to think of the wonderful person you have become. Be your own inspiration, your own valentine. When people say to share your love with others, it implies that, first, you must share it with yourself. Love the person you are, love the people you're with and love the version of you that you know you're going to be.