I'll admit it. I have a problem with motivation. A problem with procrastination.

I feel like this is a topic rarely seen, not just on The Odyssey, but across the social media platforms in general. There's a lot out there about self-care and self-love and these topics do certainly help people struggling with personal problems, but there are rarely articles and people talking about their own struggles with becoming productive.

I mean, makes sense. Not many people would enjoy showing the whole world their personal struggles. But I think in a sense the whole thing of social media pushing people to show only their best faces is quite sad. And when you think about it, for many it's not even an overarching social pressure to only show the good times. I believe, at this point of social media, the general public knows that posts on social media only show the good times. This is because sharing the struggles is hard.

Sharing your personal problems is, well, personal. People inherently want to only share happiness with others. If you yourself are feeling down, why would you blast that all over a public platform where people you kind of knew (but not really) in high school can see as well?

Sharing that you've lost motivation and are not sure where you're going is self-disclosure, something you typically only share with your closest friends. Self-disclosure to the general public can be awkward. So let me be a bit awkward for you.

I wait until the last minute to get out of bed for class. I head out to class at the last minute to get to class exactly on time. I start getting ready for events or hangouts 30 minutes before (which including showering and doing eyebrows and choosing an outfit can be a struggle). I do homework due at midnight an hour before. I sleep at 2 am for no particular reason. I go through five alarms before getting up. I wait until the last minute to get out of bed for class.

So, you get a general idea. I lack motivation, direction, and discipline. The other day, I decided that was enough. You see, the most difficult part of breaking out of those bad habits is actually getting yourself up and doing things. Trust me, once you get up and out of the cozy bed, you can't stop moving. All you really have to do is put your mind to it, which of course requires motivation. Okay, so yes, this is getting a bit cliche and cheesy, but cliche sayings are cliche for a reason. People believe they work.

Please note, I'm not ever saying just "I'm lazy." Actions happen because you believe in them. When you believe you're lazy, you're overlooking the deeper roots of why you act in those specific ways.

I still have a long way to go on my journey. I will probably wake up tomorrow trying to be productive and spend another two hours on Netflix, but the point is I'm not going to give myself excuses anymore. I want to live a productive life, and I am going to work at that harder every day. Maybe I'll even finish my 1/4 filled bullet journal this year. This is my declaration of war on laziness.