The autopsy is begun at 8 p.m. (let’s be honest, the education motivation didn’t come until about 6:30 p.m.) on Dec. 6, 2015. The body was found laid across the floor in the library. The cause of death is over-consumption of information from five different subjects.
I know all college students that completed Fall Finals 2015 are celebrating not only survival but the little sanity still available in their lives. From an affected college student, we ask parents, family members, and friends to not ask for details about finals week, because to fully explain would require an admittance into a psychiatric ward, or else we would become frustrated all over again. Trust me, you don’t want that.
Personally, finals week truly tested my personal strength and health. I noticed that, when explaining to another student the struggles you’ve endured, the amount of trials and tribulations encountered becomes a competition.
First person: “I have to write two papers and I didn’t go to bed until 3 a.m.”
Second person: “Well, I had to do a group project, cook dinner for the entire dorm hall, finish three papers, and I have five final exams.”
Random freshman: “Well, I only have one final.”
[Simultaneously gives death stare and proceeds to find a burial spot]
When someone asks me how my finals week treated me, my response follows as, “I saw the sun rise twice.” I appreciate God’s creation of light, but I did not plan to view this gorgeous appearance during the most stressful week, especially twice. Sometimes, I reevaluated my decision to become a Communications major and to pursue becoming an international broadcast journalist with the amount of papers and the deadlines spanning one day.
Due to the great probability my parents will read this article, I will not go into detail regarding my cuisine regiment, but only inform them that I’m still alive and please be prepared for me to annihilate the pantry and refrigerator.
Overall, I am thankful for the concept of finals week. I learned that many of us need to work on procrastination, time management, and thank God for taking AP English and being able to crank out essays like professors email extra assignments before something substantial is due. To celebrate surviving, the only thing we ask is an abundance of sleep and to keep the eggnog and chocolate cookies coming.
