“Until you get comfortable with being alone, you’ll never know if you’re choosing someone out of love or loneliness.” -Unknown
I remember months ago when my current boyfriend told me that I was the first girl he wanted to actually be his girlfriend. At the time, I had just had two, going on three years, of worrying about myself and taking care of myself and not having to wonder about or care about another person. I did the right thing by taking a couple years to breathe and not be suffocated by toxic relationships that college can sometimes bring. So, when Andrew told me the news, I froze. I did not know what to do or what I wanted to do. I was scared out of my mind because, in almost three years, no guy actually wanted to be tied down to a girl. Especially in college. I was on a track to just avoiding relationships altogether until after school was over. But Andrew happened.
At first, I knew I liked him but I did not know how much I liked him. He was cute and funny, and on top of that, he changed the channel on my TV to "The Golden Girls" whenever he was over. I was swooning until I froze almost to death when the word "girlfriend" came out of his mouth.
I questioned whether or not I actually liked him because I did not want to continue talking to him and hurt him if I did not feel the same way. I told myself before that my next relationship is going to be one that I can see myself being in for a while, not just a quick couple months of wondering if I really liked this guy. When I told him this, I immediately regretted it because I did not want to stop talking to him and I realized how great of a guy he really was. Even after I told him I cannot have a relationship he understood.
Yes he was upset, but he did not stop talking to me and he did not leave. That’s when I knew I found a great one. I knew that with Andrew, I was not settling, and I was not choosing to be with him because I was lonely or just wanted someone to be around.
I truly wanted to be with him and quickly realized how amazing he is to me and how the way he treats me is the way I want to be treated and the way girls are supposed to be treated.
I guess my point here is do not settle for less than you deserve. I struggled so much with this concept for my first two years of college thinking that prince charming was not out there. I had just given up when literal Prince Charming (a.k.a Andrew) walked through my dorm room door and laid in my bed to watch The Golden Girls with me. I needed someone I could really trust and be comfortable with. I was against relationships and being someone's girlfriend until my boyfriend came around. There was no way I was not going to date this kid. I know I had to tie this one down because I only ever woke up wanting to talk to him and wanting to hangout.
Personally, waiting was rough but now I am the happiest I have ever been. Give it time and do not settle when you are lonely, but tie down the one person who changed the game for you.