If my father ever gets you in a car, he will likely give you a speech titled, “Assets and Liabilities.” He considers it a speech that everyone should hear, or at least everyone with whom he can hold a captive audience. Originally designed to be a speech on how to choose a future partner, this talk is actually a guide to making enriching life choices.
"Assets and Liabilities" is a way that my father determines which relationships that are worthy of your time and attention. Granted, when he delivers this speech he is focused on future paramours. He always starts this way, “Now, whoever you are going to be dating, you need to make sure that they are an asset, not a liability.”
By this my father means that you should make good investments with your time. One of his biggest pet peeves (for me as well) is wasting time. The philosophy of assets and liabilities is to make choices that will benefit me over time. After all, why spend time on something that isn't going to hinder you instead of help you.
In high school my father’s biggest things that he pointed as an asset was someone with whom I shared morals; someone who either had a job or was pursuing their education; someone who had a car (you must realize, in my hometown a Wal-Mart is a minimum 20 miles away); or someone who would respect me and someone who would not stop me from accomplishing life goals. An asset doesn’t need a fancy job or lots of money. They simply must be willing to help you accomplish goals while you help them do the same.
My dad claims that one should only spend their time with people who make you better. An asset is someone with whom your affection and time is worth investing. They give you a return on your time though support, understanding, love, empathy and nurturing. But an asset is not just that. An asset is a person who is a catalyst for your personal growth. They help you thrive by encouragement and through your own journey. They become your companion without deterring your growth.
Classifying someone as a liability does not make him or her an inherently bad person. This just means that you don’t mix. They are not compatible with you. Instead, their wants, goals, aspirations, etc. don't match up with yours, or they inhibit the life you want to make for yourself. They might treat you in a way that is not ideal (read here: they treat you like sh*t) or you have major moral clashes. A big tip off for a liability is someone who requires a change in personality for their love and affection.
Even though this is typically applied to my friends through their dating lives, I must say that this philosophy, this cost benefit analysis of relationships is something that is applicable to almost every asset in life. Do things that will enrich you. Don’t do things that will be a hindrance to your goals. Do things to feel happy rather than out of obligation. Go after your dreams. Laugh and dance if that makes you happy. Don’t become your own liability.
