We’ve all heard the phrase “energy vampires,” right? You probably know this term as it has been coined for those individuals that are known to suck the life right from out of you? You know these people personally and perhaps you’ve already begun visualizing both their faces and the last time they did such and such to you. You’re imagining it all by now, aren’t you?
It’s disheartening to say the least and very frustrating when we consider all of the time, effort and hope that we’ve invested in these people, jobs and relationships. However, as one of my favorite lifestyle influencers Felicia “Fee” LaTour says it’s important to “invest in yourself” and one simply cannot do that without monitoring their personal energy bank.
Personally speaking, monitoring my energy bank has been crucial to my year already. Taking inventory weekly, if not daily and noticing as well addressing the vultures of my life.
I’m carefully choosing to use the term vultures and not vampires because I think that sometimes we misconstrue the situations and people in our lives. For instance, vultures are known to only be harmful to that — that it scavenges along. For the masses, they appear to be a harmless nuisance, which is what protects them as well. It’s literally ILLEGAL to kill specific vultures, yet we disdain everything about them.
If you’re struggling to see the correlation, allow me to draw the connecting line. In many ways it’s similar to the jobs we work, the washed friendships that we drain ourselves to maintain and the old pain that we “unwillingly” yet willingly carry. To many these facets are a harmless nuisance, they’re obligations and family members, the mold of who you “use” to be and so much more, but you and I, the ones whose lives are being scavenged through, they’re our demise… the source that drains us dry.
“Unwillingly yet willingly carry."
This phrase is painful for me to write, because I’ll be honest I’m great at playing the victim and for a long time it was kind of my thing. I would often victimize myself and negate the fact that I was choosing to give my energy to the very things that were scavenging through my space.
You know, vultures are known to often take on the defenseless which isn’t to be pigeoned hold to the sick, injured, dead but simply just vulnerable. And vulnerability, honey affects us all. It’s our nature as humans to be vulnerable one time or another and if such isn't properly honored and taken care of, you can easily become defenseless.
Which I should’ve prefaced in the beginning that being defenseless equates to being unaware. That’s simply the catch! When you aren’t aware of your needs in life and what drains your energy as well as what uplift your spirit you are defenseless. And those who are defenseless are accessible to any and everything that is offered to them... which scavenges their vulnerability.
Just as I wrote that I was the queen of victimizing myself, I’d be remiss not to mention that I struggle with eliminating what’s most draining in my life! For many reasons, but I’d suppose that the main two definitely stem from my thriving work ethic and my empathetic nature. These reasons alone, keep me drained at my job and wearing many relational hats that scavenge through my inner peace at times.
As I’ve been struggling to honor my vulnerability while ensuring that I am willingly participating in every aspect of my life, I’ve realized that at least for me, a majority of my vultures reside in important aspects of my life. Which means that many of these facets I cannot just toss away!
I mean, it isn’t often that we can just rid ourselves of our responsibilities or relationship (even the ones that appear to be draining.) Sometimes we have to adjust the dynamics to provide relief, “eliminating roosting areas” is one of the top methods to eliminate the presence of vultures.
This is how we protect our energy from those that are scavenging your space.
1. Eliminate the roosting areas in your life by managing your time and presence
Begin to manage what you allow yourself to take stock in and who you allow to sit at your table. Shoot, for some cases, start to track how much time you spend giving your attention to either that person or situation (or perhaps even both).
2. Start to assess and, Most importantly, deal with yourself in honesty.
Honesty is truly the best policy especially in times that you’re vulnerable. It’s both ok and highly necessary to acknowledge that “yes you’re open but not accessible to any and everything”.
I guarantee you that as focus on both assessing and protecting your energy bank you’ll find that the gentleness of your spirit doesn’t equate to weakness and that with having no lack, you can maintain against the vultures of your life!