Aspiring Actress To Aspiring Neonatologist

I remember the exact moment I decided I wanted to be an actress. It was as if I found my purpose in life. I was a seventh grader who had no idea what my identity consisted of. My first day of drama class I discovered a talent that I never knew I had. Being acknowledged by my classmates and one of my favorite teachers who adored me until the day she passed away gave me my first sense of purpose in life. It made me feel needed and wanted, which was and still is two of my greatest desires. As I practiced my craft and became more and more engulfed in the vision every aspiring actress or actor has, I became more hungry to make that vision become a reality because I did not want to become another statistic; someone who wanted it but could not get it. I carried this vision through high school and it even aided in giving me a full tuition paid theater scholarship to college. Oh, that was a blessing! It was the beginning of my visions becoming a reality. Being on the stage in front of people became one of my favorite places, whether I was dancing, the main character in a play, or just in the ensemble. Almost everything I did consisted of performing and I was in love with it until one day, in my freshmen year of college, a sense of being lost came over me. As if something was telling me that I am in the right place at the right time but I belong somewhere else in the future.

I began soul searching. Asking myself one simple question, “what career would bring my life pure joy and happiness if I was the only person on the earth to satisfy.” When I asked myself this question, acting did not come to my mind. What immediately came to my mind was “I want to work with and save newborn babies. Something I have said I wanted to do since I was about four years old.” At that moment, I felt like my seventh grade self again; finding my purpose in this life except this time it was not about proving to others that I can do it; it was not about getting the acknowledgments; and it was not about overcoming a statistic. It was all about what would bring mejoy. My entire freshman year was about finding my identity and learning about who I want to be as a person. I have learned more about myself in the past year and a half than I ever have in the past 19 years. Acting was my comfort and I still love it, but I had to learn that just because I have a talent for something, does not always mean it is my purpose in life. Sometimes it is just another accessory to the dynamic person that I am.

My heart, my passion lies with one of the purest and strongest forms of life. Newborn babies. I have always been drawn to the miraculous process of conception, birth, and the natural adaptation to life. But, what really caught my intention is the overlooked strength that ill newborns (babies that need intensive care) possess. These babies have no true sense of life, yet they are here, fighting for a life they know nothing about. Being there, being a part of their fight would bring me joy, giving me purpose to get out of bed every day. Giving love and hope to families and being able to truly put my faith to work, not for myself but for others. That brings me absolute joy and I have not even begun. The day I felt lost lead me to the moment I truly found my purpose.