I think it's safe to say some guys can be JERKS. They come into your life, make you happy, get you to like and care about them and then, after a while, they shit on you. It's like when you decide that you want something more than sex and occasional dates to Waffle House, they suddenly don't want a relationship right now. Coming to the realization that the person you want so much doesn't want you could have you in your feelings and constantly questioning and wondering these five things:
1. He doesn't want a relationship right now, but will he want one later?
Most of the time when a guy says he doesn't want a relationship right now, that usually means he just doesn't want one with you, and he just doesn't want to hurt your feelings. But depending on the situation, it could also mean exactly what he said: he's just not ready right now. If you've been dealing with him for a while, then you know the situation that you two have, so it's up to you to ask questions and see what's the real deal.
2. What can I do to make him ready?
Nothing. If he wanted you in his life, he would've made that happen already, or he would've at least assured you that it will happen eventually. What you can do is give him space. I don't mean ignore him; just give him some time to figure out what he wants, and if he wants to be with you, he will ask for your attention and let it be known that he wants you in his life. If he doesn't make that known, then you know where you stand.
3. Why does he even want me around?
He probably does like you as a person, but you're just not the person he wants to be with. Or maybe you're just convenient; you answer when he calls or you spread your legs whenever he wants. Or maybe he really actually likes and cares about you and wants to be with you, but he just wants to take it slow.
4. Why did he bother me if he didn't want me?
This is confusing, especially if he did/does all the things a real boyfriend would do. What he wants are the benefits that a relationship entails while he continues to do him. Or he could really think you're an amazing person, but his circumstances won't let him commit to you right now.
5. Should I leave him alone?
If you've given him space and he hasn't made an effort to keep you in his life, then maybe it's time to let him go. But if he is showing you that your what he wants and he eventually wants to make you and him a thing, then see where it goes. Ultimately that's up to you.
*Remember, not right now doesn't necessarily mean not ever, but then again if he wanted to be with you he would've already made that happen.*
