Ask Athena!
(For godly advice)
Dear Athena,
I’m a sophomore and just started talking and hanging out with this guy T, who’s a senior here at TCU. T and I have been casually seeing each other for a little over a month now and I can see things developing into a more serious relationship. Even though I like T a lot and have been secretly wanting a boyfriend for some time now I’m not sure if I should get involved with him when he’ll be leaving at the end of the year! I don’t want things to end and I’m conflicted on letting a serious relationship begin but I really like him!!! What should I do?
- M M.
M M,
Though your situation isn’t exactly ideal time wise, it doesn’t mean that it’s an automatic deal breaker, and to be completely honest, you’re freaking out mostly over assumptions you put into your own head. These thoughts are only going to make you worry and unable to fully enjoy where things currently are in your relationship.
My first piece of advice would be to forget about trying to map out the relationship and enjoy the present. If and when the anticipated question of “Will you be my girlfriend?” reveals itself, you have two choices; “Yes” or “No!” Personally, I say not to limit yourself with yes or no. If you’re going to be 100% committed to someone other than yourself, it has to be worth it, so if it is, then go for it. If you’re still unsure when he asks you then just be honest and say you want to keep it casual until you figure out what you want. If you don’t think it has the potential to become a healthy and serious relationship then say no. Don’t limit yourself to a yes or no answer, if its you who’s going to be in the relationship then it’s you who has the right and power to control what happens.
Time may not be on your side, but that doesn’t mean you have to waste it worrying about things that haven’t happened yet. In the end, I can’t tell you exactly what to do because I don’t know you two personally, but I think you should do whatever you feel most comfortable with and that makes you most happy! Although, I do have one request. Please, please, please do not be one of those people who find themselves stuck in a relationship because she “feels bad!” I hope everything works out but that’s all the advice I got for ya!
-Athena
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