Breakups are difficult for everyone involved to say the very least. Some common "cures" are often ice cream, alcohol, clubbing, or even random hook-ups; these are considered normal or even expected reactions after a couple calls it quits. But recently in a town too close to home, a horrible breakup story left me absolutely speechless and heartbroken without even being involved. After she broke up with her boyfriend of one year, Ashley Doolittle from Berthoud, Colorado was kidnapped and shot in the head twice by her then ex-boyfriend Tanner Flores. They were both only 18 years old and still had the brightest of futures before them.

First and foremost, I would like to pay my respects to everyone with ties to this devastation. I never knew Ashley, but I heard nothing less than glowing things about her. I pray that she may rest in paradise and allow her story to be a message to so many young people in relationships. I also pray her family and friends find strength in her memory and live to make it proud.

I will not bash the family of Ashley's ex-boyfriend, I pray for them even more. I pray they find guidance and are able to help their son find the piece of himself he seems to have lost.

It is so incredibly difficult for me to wrap my head around this horror. I can't imagine being Ashley and having the man you recently spent a year of your young life with take you hostage and point a gun at your head. It raises so many questions for me of the things that could’ve been running through her head. Did she have any idea what was about to unfold before her? Yes, he was "upset" and "distraught" over the breakup according to friends—who isn't shaken after ending a one-year relationship? But those two words don't quite portray the idea of madness leading to murder. I can't help but wonder if there were signs leading up to this situation that can serve as red flags to others so something like this never occurs again.

The police report says that Ashley's parents called the police when she was only 25 minutes late for her curfew (so I should probably be on time for mine more). At this point, they had already searched the areas nearby and found her empty car. They seemed to have known something was wrong even that soon which brings me to the conclusion that there were signs that Ashley was in danger, but perhaps they had no idea how much. Of course, how could they know that the man they had let into their home and date their daughter would later kill her? The amount of betrayal and anger they must feel is unimaginable and my heart goes out to them.

Although I cannot fathom any feeling strong enough to make you want to shoot someone in the head you previously claimed to love, there has to be an explanation. In no way am I justifying his actions nor am I condoning this type of reaction to be considered normal, but there are possibilities that could have contributed to Tanner's actions.

I would like to address the possibility of mental illness. According to the released police report, friends of Tanner's said that they had received messages that were suicidal in nature from him. I am neither a physiatrist nor a friend of Tanner's myself. But generally, if Tanner was genuinely feeling this way, there would be warning signs of unstable tendencies and red flags of insecurities. This could be combated simply with an awareness of this illness. If you ever receive signs of messages that seem harmful to the sender or others, it is absolutely crucial that professional help is alerted. The necessity of this is seen in this situation and others like it time and time again.

I would also like to bring to light the problems video games raises in young men. Far too many of these games are shamefully violent and convey women as objects that can be used and disposed of. These terrifying messages can then be so easily perpetuated in everyday life and can possibly contribute to the male supremacist ideologies present in today's society.

It’s absolutely heartbreaking that an instance like this must occur in order for issues like these to be brought to attention. They have become so present in modern culture that they are almost invisible and therefore not contended with.