The Dream Women Are Ashamed To Admit
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Adulting

It's 2019 And Women Are Ashamed To Admit They Want To Raise Families

If you really believe in a woman's right to her life, don't set conditions.

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Young family

There is still truth in the statement "it's a man's world."

I am all for women in power because the struggle to show our strength and earn our rights has been a long one, and still, to this day, it can be a struggle.

In no way is this article saying that I think all women should settle down and submit to a man, so let's get that straight.

However, I do ask the question, why is starting a family a dream women now are scared or ashamed to admit? I've worked with young women who have no interest in starting a family what so ever, and there is the occasional one who will ask me why I want to have one. Most will respect my opinion, but as I said, there is the occasional, usually passionate feminist, who tells me that's not what I want.

Ever since I was young, I have dreamt of having a family. I have a bazillion baby names I absolutely adore. Almost daily, I dream of a future husband who will love me and grow old with me. But let me reassure all the feminists who are shuddering about now, I don't plan on playing housewife. I don't need to hear your June Cleaver jokes.

I fully intend to get either a Master's or Doctorate in the field I am studying. And I'm not going to "throw it away" to start a family.

Enough about me though.

There are several, single young women, like myself, who want nothing more than a wedding ring, the kids, the house, the whole white picket fence dream. And their dreams should never, ever, be called wrong. Their hopes are not silly. They are not women who drool at a man's feet or sit around staring out the window, waiting for Prince Charming.

These women are loyal, hard-working, funny, kind, beautiful, intelligent, etc. and deserve everything they have worked for in their life so far. But after all is said about their current life, work, and goals. There is always one thing you can just tell by looking at them that they haven't listed all their life goals. There is that one thing they don't want to admit, because of all the judgment from other women. They're afraid that it will make them look weak or silly.

A young woman should not have to fear that if she admits to wanting a family, all that she has worked for will disappear and other women will seize to see her strength and determination. The idea has become one that makes young girls blush as though ashamed of wanting something so trivial.

Trivial.

So ladies who shame young, fellow females for wanting a family... please tell me this. How is wanting to carry a child literally inside you for nine months and give them your all, your life, your love to them for more than 18 years, weak? How is wanting to learn to die to self and become more caring, shameful? How is wanting to serve someone with all your heart, body, and soul, silly? How is wanting to better your skills by learning to cook for more than one and have clean clothes to wear, stupid? How is going to bed, tired from work but knowing you are loved and relied on by the ones you love, trivial?

Let me help you: it's not.


This generation is a big hubbub of confusion and contradiction. It's plastered all over social media that we as females need to stand together but when a young woman has the audacity to talk about or post about wanting a family, immediately other women tear her down.

We're slowly forgetting how much strength it takes to be a mother and wife. We marvel at her physical strength as she carries a child and gives birth. But what still remains forgotten by women who haven't experienced motherhood or been reminded, is the strength a woman shows as she lays down her life for her home every day.

Life has become so modernized. Houses have to be Pinterest worthy instead of comfortable. Young couples have to maintain "goals" status on Facebook while their relationship consists of pretty much texting. Love is no longer pure, it's all about sex. Sex is no longer shared it's serving one's self. Marriage is no longer forever, it's until "this isn't working for me."

A woman wanting a family is no longer seen as brave but slowing down feminist's progress.

It's as if giving up your life for others is no longer an incredible thing. But it can't be, right? I mean, we admire our heroes on the battlefield, those who risk their lives for justice, people who would risk everything for the ones they love.

But marriage and motherhood? Get with the times, lady, it's 2019.

No!

Stop with the shaming. Start showing love and support. If you really believe in a woman's right to her life, don't set conditions. Don't laugh when she says she wants to have a family, she didn't laugh when you said you didn't.

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