Seeing as friends come and go and that they don't all stay in my life, it's taught me that I'm not able to make everyone happy no matter what I do or say. Acting like myself and being myself isn't good enough for people and I've had to accept that.
The unfortunate truth is that people clearly aren't going to accept us as we are, despite if they say they will and will always be there for us. It just isn't that way because these types of people lie, are deceiving, and don't like to listen to what we have to say to them.
Photo by Roberto Nickson
Over the course of my life, I've worked on bettering myself for myself, not for anyone else. The people in my life that have stayed are the ones who accept me and appreciate me for who I am and who I've turned into. Everyone else that has come into my life for a temporary time weren't keepers.
An issue that I have with these types of temporary friends is that I happily give advice to them when they ask for it, but for some reason that I cannot understand or fathom, the advice goes in one ear and out the other, not ever being processed or considered. Basically, the red flag is that my opinion means nothing and that my advice isn't good enough for them; so much that they don't want to listen to what I have to say, and then when they realize that I was right, they try to come back and beg for mercy. However, at that point, it's too late.
Photo by Vince Fleming
This type of treatment shows me that I'm not valued enough by these people and that they're undeserving of my advice and my friendship as a whole. It's sad to see them go, but bittersweet at the same time because I can't afford to keep anyone in my life that treats me this way. I don't have time for them if all they're going to do is drag me back down to their level, use me for something that they need, and then ignore me and don't talk to me for weeks at a time. For those situations, I'm only ever contacted when someone needs something from me.
The conversation starts out sounding like my friends care about me, I'm asked about how I'm doing and how my day has been, etc. Once we're past that part, I get used and abused and then let go.
Photo by Omar Lopez
Regardless, this is the type of person that I am. I like to be there for people if they're having a hard time, to be a shoulder to cry on and to be a friend to talk to when someone needs one. I also just really enjoy having fun with my friends, not always having to be there in only bad times. However, I've learned that the right people won't abuse this type of friendship and genuine love that I have to give. If they do, they're not worth it.
Sorry, not sorry.