Hello, it's me again. We've been through so much together over the years and I think it is time to own up to my mistakes. I owe you an apology and I know that saying "I'm sorry" could never justify what I did or make up for what I have put you through. I'm sorry means absolutely nothing because the damage is done and as much as I want to take it all back, I can't. I can't take the pain back but I can learn from it. I'm trying to better myself and I want to make it up to you because you deserve so much more that what I have given you. I know I'm sorry won't change anything, but I am hoping you will hear me out.

I'm sorry for having such a negative image of you engraved in my mind. I'm sorry for comparing you to others and wish you were more like them. I'm sorry for allowing other people's opinions to overrule yours. I'm sorry for the times I denied you food and skipped a meal. I'm sorry for the times I chose to eat, but chose poorly and didn't give you the energy you needed to get through the day. I'm sorry for not getting enough sleep, for staying up too late and getting up too early. I'm sorry for looking in the mirror and feeling sadness or anger towards you. I'm sorry for not reacting positively when I see you in pictures standing next to my friends. I'm sorry for calling you fat or ugly because I don't have confidence in you. I'm sorry for every time I cried in a dressing room because I didn't feel good enough.

I'm sorry for being so hard on you and putting you down. I'm sorry I was never there for you or stood up for you when you needed it. I'm sorry for every time I cut, scraped, bruised, and broke you. I'm sorry for trying to hide behind an "I'm fine" instead of acknowledging you and being honest with myself. I need to remind myself that you are the one keeping me alive. 1 Corinthians 6:19 reads, "Your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit, who lives in you and was given to you by God. You do not belong to yourself." The body is not mine to keep is it simply the body I am using until I pass onto the next life.

God gave me you and you are a sacred space in which I can experience this life. I promise to be more aware of how I treat you and how my actions impact you. I promise to listen to you and believe in you. I promise to see you in a new light and only confront you in positive vibes, respect, and love. I promise to take better care of you as the journey continues. I promise to eat better, exercise more, meditate and pray more so we can live a healthier lifestyle and have a healthier relationship.