To those with anxiety,
First of all, everything is going to be OK. I know it is hard. I know what it is like to shake so badly that it makes your bones ache. I know how difficult it is to go outside when your mind is fighting a battle against itself. I know what it is like to want to claw yourself out of your own skin. But it is OK. We are warriors.
I used to think that I was doomed to be alone and afraid forever. I didn’t want to go out with friends because I never wanted them to see me panic. I never wanted them to meet my anxiety. It is so easy for me to drown in the voices of a crowd. In an instant, my whole world could turn black and fear could grab my neck so tightly that I forget what breathing feels like. I couldn’t let anyone see that side of me. No one could know.
But here is the thing — whether I like it or not, my anxiety is a part of me. I can either fight it for the rest of my life, or accept it and embrace it. After spending years hiding, I finally learned to love myself for who I am. And I’m telling you that you can do the same. It isn’t easy to be vulnerable, but it is necessary. Our anxiety can be a gift. We are sensitive people, so we can understand and sympathize with others. We know how to read the lines that are etched into our friends’ faces. We know how to breathe the words of patience and love because that is all we have. Most of all, we are strong. We have to fight hard every day of our lives. But we always win. We ARE warriors.
It is so important to stay strong. I know it isn’t easy. I cannot tell you how many times I cried myself to sleep…but I still woke up the next day every single time. The sun always came out the next day. Life went on. Sometimes, the only form of stability we have is our own pulse. Other times, we manage to put our shattered pieces back together. Think about how wonderful it feels when we finally grip something that comforts us. Life is worth those moments. Yes, sometimes the fear can be overwhelming, but think of how much you have lived! Think about how deeply you can feel. Think about how vibrant and strong every moment of your life is, good bad or otherwise. That is worth holding onto. That is worth embracing.
The hardest thing to do is learn to love something that can cause so much pain, but I promise you that it is worth it. Your anxiety is not a mistake — it isn’t a flaw. It is what makes you strong and passionate and sensitive. You are so special — so uniquely made. Don’t you ever lose sight of that.
