Last week I went in for an interview with a large, professional, high-end company seeking interns. I’d already applied and had a phone interview, and now I was to meet my potential employers face-to-face. From what I gathered, it would last several hours and include lunch with the editors of said company.
Having never done anything of this caliber before, I was naturally a tad overwhelmed and half of me wanted nothing more than to run back home and hide in the comfort of my living room while watching endless hours of Netflix.
Comfort zone supreme.
But my other half also knew this was an opportunity I would never forgive myself for skipping. The parameters of this internship were quite conducive to my current life situation, and I knew that even if I didn’t get the job, I would never come across a chance quite this good again.
So I prepared. I updated and printed out my resume, gathered additional information I might need, tried on a bunch of outfits until I found the perfect one, did some research on the people I would be speaking with and baked some brownies as a thank-you for my aunt (who ended up taking me to the town I’d never been to before).
Through all this, I still wanted to hide and watch television. Nothing could ever fully prepare me to face my fear of speaking with successful people who will judge whether or not I would be a good fit for a job I would desperately love. However, I kept repeating one thing to myself as the hours counted down:
“I’m passionate about this.”
Writing has been my passion for seven straight years now, and I have sunk a lot of time and money into making that passion reality. This internship has the perfect content to let me flex my new skills and gain real capability for a future filled with nothing but writing and media. The hours I’d spent studying, the scores of constructive criticism I had embraced and the years of effort I’d put into gaining all the experience needed for this type of life all culminated in one place, and I would be a fool if I let this slip by because I was scared.
So instead of caving in, I harnessed the nervous, shaky energy of my own anxiety and forced it to work for me. Despite being afraid, I walked into the interview early and spent the next three hours exploring every detail of the internship.
When it was over, it was over. I chose to stop worrying and instead focused on getting back to writing, like I always do—because it’s my passion. No matter what, my love for writing will always win over the fear of failure. I don’t know what the outcome will be, but I have tried and doggone it, I did my absolute best.
If the future holds another plan, then I’ll follow it. For now, I can curl up on the couch and watch as much Netflix as I want until the next challenge comes along.
