There’s always a listicle out there about what it's like to be this major or that major. And there are generally some points that are the same for each. What makes a listicle funny, though, is the truth behind it. Being an English major, there’s always more than enough substance to get something different in each one. So, here’s another funny (and not so funny) list about what you hear being an English major.
1. "Oh, so what grade will you teach?"
English, as far as I know, is the only major that everyone will automatically assume is only good for one thing: teaching. This is by far the most common question I get asked when I tell someone I'm an English major.
2. "English is the default major, right?"
Yes, I have actually heard this, spoken aloud, right to my face. Its almost amusing how many people view English as the major someone chooses when they don't know what they want. I took forever to decide if this was the right major, thank you very much.
3. "You know English majors don't make very good money, right?"
Well, no major is going to make very good money right off the bat. That's not exclusive to English majors.
4. "Hey, can you edit my essay?"
Yes, this is real. And yes, I do enjoy it, but I think others forget that I do have my own homework. And just because I'm an English major doesn't mean I know how to fix a biology report. Sorry.
5. "Oh, you're so lucky! English is the easy major."
Please, for the love of all that is holy can we stop comparing majors like it's the Olympics of stress?? My major requires intense analytical readings on at least five different books at a time, with over 400 pages a week to be read. And I know that biology and chemistry have labs to be done and organisms to be memorized. We all have hard majors no matter what they are; college isn't easy.
6. "So what are you going to DO with that?"
It's true that everyone in college gets this question. But the tone changes everything. If I'm not going to teach, then obviously there's nothing else for me, right? Nope. I can edit, I can work for non-profits, I can do any number of analytical and research-oriented jobs. I have a lot of options.
7. "You're so lucky you have such a talent for writing!"
I guess I do have a passion for it, but I wasn't always as good as I am now. I practiced a lot, I was criticized a lot, and I failed A LOT. I had to learn and re-learn how to write and what to write; I had to teach myself discipline. And I know most humanities majors feel this way, too (I see you, art majors!).
8. "You're a total introvert! Get out more!"
Yes, I am an introvert, but this isn't because I'm an English major. Sure this major might attract a certain type of person, but not everyone fits in that stereotype. I'm an introvert because I like solitude and because I can enjoy my own time with myself – not to be some Emersonian-type hermit to bust out a philosophical rendering.
9. "What story are you working on right now??"
This one isn't necessarily annoying, but it is funny to see how limited some people's view of the major is. An English major could be into literary analysis, poetry, journalism, non-fiction, fiction. There's a world of possibilities in the realm of English. We aren't all Lewises and Tolkiens.
10. "Can I read what you wrote?"
Okay, this one is really flattering, but also the most terrifying question I have ever gotten. Yes, the point is to share my work someday, but I also never want it to see the light of day. I know, I'm contradictory. (Seriously, though, thank you to everyone who has ever read my blogs or anything I've written – much love).
My list isn't the most original, or the most universally truthful list about being an English major. But it is what I have personally gotten when I tell others what my major is. And a lot of these conversations turn into something funny (or mildly frustrating). But I know that I'm in the right major for myself, and no matter what anyone says, I am proud to study English.
