Many of you may laugh at the fact that I call my relationship “long distance” when my boyfriend is 45 minutes away, but in reality, it can feel like we are in different countries at times.
Being in a long-distance relationship has been the most difficult and most rewarding thing I have ever done. Maybe you’re considering staying with the person you love through college, or the military or a move across the country. Maybe you're just bored and wanted a good read, but either way, here are some of the things that I have learned.
1. You both have lives.
There are days that go on forever, and all I want to do is talk to him and tell him what I am eating for breakfast or how I got mad at the person who did not stop when I had the right of way. But the truth is just because you are not next to each other (even if it feels like the world stopped) life goes on. You both must live your separate lives and strive towards personal goals, and then you get to share those things with your partner. It is a completely new and scary concept to not know exactly what color (or two) socks he is wearing, but it is just part of growing up.
2. The hours you get together will feel like seconds.
This is not an exaggeration. You will go days or weeks missing him and count down to when you see him next, and then it will be over. Cherish the kisses and memories you get, because you won't get them as often as you'd like. You will miss watching him sing too loudly to music you never liked, so enjoy it while it's happening. The biggest piece of advice I can give is to be present. Live in the moment, put down your phones, say, “I love you,” as much as possible, and know that you will get a next time.
3. Communication is the only way this will work.
I learned (the hard way) that living my life only thinking of myself won’t keep a relationship strong. Be ready for late-night phone calls when you have an 8 a.m. class, or Skyping just to hear their voice when you should be studying for an exam. Every time you talk and share silly stories or pointless details, you will grow closer together. Sometimes it will seem hard to text back, and sometimes you will barely be able to keep your eyes open on the phone, but if you can’t see each other every day, you will want to talk. It won’t be a chore to tell your partner about your French homework, because keeping them on the phone as long as possible is what you will be striving for.
4. On the other hand, do not be upset when they cannot give you their full attention.
With two busy people living two busy lives, there are going to be times where you cannot talk for hours, or even text back. You just have to know that it isn't personal, that you are loved, and that you will get to talk soon. While this distance should not become a habit, it is something that is inevitable when you are apart.
5. If you can make it through this, you can make it through most anything.
Staying in love while being apart is hard work, but it is the most natural thing when it is with the right person. After all this being apart and way too many miles on your cars, one day you will can get married and live with the person you love (which is a whole different adventure to look forward to). The distance is a challenge, but it only makes the future more worth it.
I think I have the best boyfriend a girl could ever ask for and I wish I could clone him so every girl in the world could see how incredible relationships should be. I wish you and your partner the best of luck!
