An Open Letter To The Man I Thought Was The One | The Odyssey Online
Start writing a post
Relationships

An Open Letter To The Man I Thought Was The One

It took three years and a silly engagement to realize you weren't.

1361
An Open Letter To The Man I Thought Was The One
GeorgiaGene

J.S -

They say you meet 5 different types of Soul Mates in your lifetime. And for a while, I thought you were the true one. It took three years and a silly engagement to realize you weren't.

Let's not start there though. I want to start from the beginning, how when we met I specifically told you I could be everything you wanted with no strings attached in the exchange that you would be honest with me. I would leave you alone, never get attached, never get angry, but only if you remained honest. You said you were when just after a few days you took me out on a date, I knew then that it was becoming a slippery slope and I should have gotten out immediately. Once someone shows me true affection I get attached, I can't leave them alone; I become jealous. But, that night I realized you were my best friend and I couldn't just leave. We had so much in common, we could talk about anything for hours and laugh constantly, we could do it all together. I should have known then.

Fast forward a few months; by this time I was head over heels for you. I was 16, what else could you expect? Except the love I felt wasn't some childish naivety, it was real. I felt something deep within me and for some reason, I convinced myself that it was True Love. Yes, I was young and yes, I was dumb...But I would have done anything for you. You knew that. That's why things started to fall apart. Now that I'm older I know what happened- you were in love with me too. You just didn't want to be. You were four years older but no more mature than I was. You were young and dumb too. You knew you loved me, your friends would come to me and tell me things like "I've never seen him act like this" and "It's like you hexed him". All that led me deeper down the rabbit hole, with my thoughts screaming at me that it was meant to be, it was meant to be, it was meant to be.

You tortured my love for you. One day you were holding me telling me you wanted this forever and the next you ignored me for hours and told me you didn't want to see me anymore.

Did you ever count how many times you called me drunk, crying, asking for me back? It was five.

Did you ever count the times you said you were sorry and wanted me back? I lost count somewhere in our first year.

I say, "asking for me back" like we were ever together. But we weren't, we were never official. It was three years of back and forth friendship that always ended in sex. For some reason I could never quite get over you, we could go months without speaking but once you called I would be right back in your passenger seat in the parking lot of Winco talking about the whole universe.

I couldn't give up on my best friend.

I kept thinking you would grow up and see, you would see all that I have done and would do for you. I waited and waited for you. I thought we were meant to be and one day you would grow up and you would see. I kept playing in my head scenarios of you coming back to me and asking me to marry you and we would be together forever. I kept thinking we would find each other in a coffee shop somewhere and we would catch up, fall in love again and be together.

I thought you were the one.

The truth today is, maybe you were, but not in this life. In this life, I believe I deserve better. I deserve a man that's 100% sure of what he wants, not one that could never decide. I deserve a man worth all my love until death into the next life. I deserve more than what you could ever give.

You once said we had nothing in common. Now that I am older, I realize what you really meant.

You eventually did realize though, I'm not sure when. But you did, it was obvious the last time we spoke a few months ago. I too wish that we could be friends, and I will always love you and always miss you. But I have moved on, and the man I am with now does not deserve the stress that comes when two old lovers stay friends.

This man deserves me. From the moment he met me he knew 100% that I was exactly what he wanted. He asked me to marry him with a ring pop three days after we met. Yes, I am still young and still a little dumb, but I know what I want, what I deserve. This man is more of a man than you ever were to me. I see you now and I see your growth to this day and I just want to say to you:

I still love you, but you will never have me. I hope to the universe that one day you'll meet a girl that will love you like I did and that you will be mature enough to see it and you don't let her go. Don't let her go because a love like mine only comes once and if you get it twice. Don't. Let. Go.

He has my love today, all of it, and forever. It took me a few months, I was blinded by my past, but eventually I realized the man I have today is my One True Love. I'm young, but we have already gone through so much. I know it's together forever for us.

Maybe one day we can be friends, and I hope that you see this and read it. It's everything I've ever wanted to say to you. You hurt me deeper then anyone but you also taught me the most, for that I will always be grateful.

I hope you have fun in Japan. I heard it's great there.

Sincerely, the person you used to call Cheese Pizza.

Report this Content
This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
Entertainment

Every Girl Needs To Listen To 'She Used To Be Mine' By Sara Bareilles

These powerful lyrics remind us how much good is inside each of us and that sometimes we are too blinded by our imperfections to see the other side of the coin, to see all of that good.

147075
Every Girl Needs To Listen To 'She Used To Be Mine' By Sara Bareilles

The song was sent to me late in the middle of the night. I was still awake enough to plug in my headphones and listen to it immediately. I always did this when my best friend sent me songs, never wasting a moment. She had sent a message with this one too, telling me it reminded her so much of both of us and what we have each been through in the past couple of months.

Keep Reading...Show less
Zodiac wheel with signs and symbols surrounding a central sun against a starry sky.

What's your sign? It's one of the first questions some of us are asked when approached by someone in a bar, at a party or even when having lunch with some of our friends. Astrology, for centuries, has been one of the largest phenomenons out there. There's a reason why many magazines and newspapers have a horoscope page, and there's also a reason why almost every bookstore or library has a section dedicated completely to astrology. Many of us could just be curious about why some of us act differently than others and whom we will get along with best, and others may just want to see if their sign does, in fact, match their personality.

Keep Reading...Show less
Entertainment

20 Song Lyrics To Put A Spring Into Your Instagram Captions

"On an island in the sun, We'll be playing and having fun"

36382
Person in front of neon musical instruments; glowing red and white lights.
Photo by Spencer Imbrock on Unsplash

Whenever I post a picture to Instagram, it takes me so long to come up with a caption. I want to be funny, clever, cute and direct all at the same time. It can be frustrating! So I just look for some online. I really like to find a song lyric that goes with my picture, I just feel like it gives the picture a certain vibe.

Here's a list of song lyrics that can go with any picture you want to post!

Keep Reading...Show less
Chalk drawing of scales weighing "good" and "bad" on a blackboard.
WP content

Being a good person does not depend on your religion or status in life, your race or skin color, political views or culture. It depends on how good you treat others.

We are all born to do something great. Whether that be to grow up and become a doctor and save the lives of thousands of people, run a marathon, win the Noble Peace Prize, or be the greatest mother or father for your own future children one day. Regardless, we are all born with a purpose. But in between birth and death lies a path that life paves for us; a path that we must fill with something that gives our lives meaning.

Keep Reading...Show less
Health and Wellness

10 Hygiene Tips For All College Athletes

College athletes, it's time we talk about sports hygiene.

32238
Woman doing pull-ups on bars with sun shining behind her.

I got a request to talk about college athletes hygiene so here it is.

College athletes, I get it, you are busy! From class, to morning workouts, to study table, to practice, and more. But that does not excuse the fact that your hygiene comes first! Here are some tips when it comes to taking care of your self.

Keep Reading...Show less

Subscribe to Our Newsletter

Facebook Comments