An Open Letter To The Girl Who I Thought Would Be My Forever Friend

An Open Letter To The Girl Who I Thought Would Be My Forever Friend

I don't miss you.

Dear Ex- Best Friend,

Sitting in your room, blasting Paranoid by Tyga, talking about life, things seemed like they couldn't get any better. Growing closer and closer by every sleepover we had each weekend, endless mall trips, ordering cheese fries from Outback with EXTRA ranch, planning our speeches for eachothers weddings, crying over boys, laughing at boys, planning to get matching tattoos and everything inbetween. You were my best friend.

Living life with you day by day, I couldn't picture having a better best friend. I really thought you would be my forever friend. We had the type of friendship that if we weren't texting and snapchatting all day, we were together. We had the type of friendship that if we didn't see each other for a whole week, it wasn't normal. We had the type of friendship that you could be brutally honest with me and I would get defensive, but I knew it was for the best. We had the type of friendship that I could walk around with no pants on, and it wasn't weird. We had the type of friendship that you would listen to me complain about the same boy, and still hear me out about how he is going to "change." We had the type of friendship that we could talk about absolutely anything and it would never get weird. We had the type of friendship that you weren't even a best friend, you were my sister.

Making the decision to not have you in my life anymore was not easy. Now, six months later I realized it was for the best. The last few months of our friendship was rocky and there was obvious tension neither of us were talking about. Our easy going, fun, loving friendship just wasn't the same. All throughout high school I made you my top priority on the friendship ladder and didn't pay other people much mind. Why would I though? We had been best friends since seventh grade. Not having many other friends seemed great in the moment, but looking back it hurt me immensely.

Thank you for the great memories we shared, but I have made new ones, with new friends. Thank you for saying I wouldn't be able to make new friends because nobody liked me, it pushed me to change myself for college. Thank you for saying my anxiety would always hold me back, and I would never be able to be romantically involved with a boy. I am now in a happy relationship. Thank you for saying you didn't want to be involved with me if I drank, cheers to that. Thank you for attempting to hold me back from making new friends because you didn't like them; it made me realize that's not what a supportive friend does. Thank you for trying to always hold me down indirectly because it pushed me to work harder. Thank you for always trying to out to do me, in everything; it made me realize not everything is materialistic and friendship shouldn't be a competition. Thank you for pushing me away from you so I can now call my new best friend, a best friend.

So, to the girl who I thought would be my forever friend, I don't miss you.


Your Ex- Best Friend

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A Letter To The Grandpas Who Left Far Too Soon

The thoughts of a girl who lost both of her grandpas too early.

Dear Grandpa,

As I get older, my memories are starting to fade. I try to cling to every last bit of memory that I have of you. There are certain memories that have stuck well in my brain, and I probably will never forget them, at least I hope I don't. I remember your smile and your laugh. I can still remember how your voice sounded. I never want to forget that. I catch myself closing my eyes to try to remember it, playing your voice over and over in my head so that I can ingrain it in my memory.

I always thought you were invincible, incapable of leaving me. You were so young, and it caught us all by surprise. You were supposed to grow old, die of old age. You were not supposed to be taken away so soon. You were supposed to see me graduate high school and college, get married to the love my life, be there when my kids are born, and never ever leave.

My heart was broken when I heard the news. I don't think I had experienced a pain to that level in my entire life. At first, I was in denial, numb to the thought that you were gone. It wasn't until Thanksgiving, then Christmas, that I realized you weren't coming back. Holidays are not the same anymore. In fact, I almost dread them. They don't have that happy cheer in the air like they did when you were alive. There is a sadness that hangs in the air because we are all thinking silently how we wished you were there. I hope when I am older and have kids that some of that holiday spirit comes back.

You know what broke my heart the most though? It was seeing your child, my parent, cry uncontrollably. I watched them lose their dad, and I saw the pain that it caused. It scared me, Grandpa, because I don't ever want to lose them like how they lost you. I can't imagine a day without my mom or dad. I still see the pain that it causes and how it doesn't go away. There are good days and there are bad days. I always get upset when I see how close people are to their grandparents and that they get to see them all the time. I hope they realize how lucky they are and that they never take it for granted. I wish I could have seen you more so that I could have more memories to remember you by.

I know though that you are watching over me. That is where I find comfort in the loss. I know that one day I will get to see you again, and I can't wait for it. I hope I have made you proud. I hope that all that I have accomplished and will accomplish makes you smile from ear to ear. I hope that the person I marry is someone you would approve of. And I hope that my kids get more time with their grandpa than I did because the amount I got wasn't fair.

I want to say thank you for raising your child to be the best parent ever because they will one day be the best grandparent ever. Just like you.

Cover Image Credit: Katelyn McKinney

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To My Thompson Hall Friends

I never expected to make such amazing friends.

Freshman year is coming to an end. It feels like just yesterday I was moving into my dorm and saying goodbye to my parents. So much has happened over these last few months. I feel like I’m a different person now.

I have survived living on my own and navigating the ups and downs of college. It was a time for growth and I’m happy to have experienced it here at Delaware.

There have been many positives as well. I started writing for Odyssey which allowed me to set aside a time each week to let my creative juices flow and formulate them into different articles. Although there have been many times where I have had writer's block, it allowed me to push through and write what I was really thinking.

I started dating a really great guy. Although I wished this had happened sooner in the school year, everything does, in fact, happen for a reason. He gets along so well with my friends and I genuinely enjoy spending time with him.

The biggest part of my year though was the friends that I had made. Without them, my life would be boring and I wouldn’t have had half of the amount of fun as I did this year. We all somehow gravitated towards each other and now we’re this big group that navigated college together.

Some of them have become my absolute best friends. I didn’t expect this to happen when coming to college, but it did and I’m beyond excited about it. We became friends so quickly simply because we’re living out of each other back pockets and are always around each other.

All I have to do is walk out of my room and down the hall to find someone to talk to. That’s my favorite part of college because someone is always around and ready to hang out. It’s nice when all of your friends live right down the hall and every night feels like a weekend.

It’s never a dull moment with our group. There’s always someone saying something stupid, and yes it will always be caught on camera. We make each other laugh so hard that we end up crying just because what that person said was so absurd.

It feels weird whenever I go home and I can’t go and talk to someone or ask if they want to make a POD run together. Sometimes it’s nice to just lay in bed and chill with someone as you both watch TV or do work. It’s just nice to always have people around.

I have never stayed up until the early morning hours in my life, but it has happened multiple times here. For good and for the bad. It doesn’t seem crazy to do that either. Someone will always want to keep talking and by the time you realize it, the sun is coming up.

I can’t thank my group of friends enough because without them college would be so beyond boring. They make me look forward to the end of the day where I can hang out with them. Thank you to my “T2” friends. Freshman year wouldn’t have been the same if I hadn’t met you.

Cover Image Credit: Ariana Pelosci

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