To the girl who has been called "too much,"
Maybe the boy you were talking to said you were "too clingy" because you double texted him. Maybe your best friend was having a bad day and when you were telling her your problems, she called you "too dramatic" because she wasn't in the mood to deal with them. Maybe your guidance counselor told you that you were "too ambitious" when you told her what you wanted to do with the rest of your life. Maybe your parents said you were "too upset" when the boy you thought you'd be with forever broke your heart.
Regardless of who, when, or how, we've all been told at some point in our lives that we were "too much," but is that really a bad thing? Should we have to explain the extent of our feelings to others? You have a right to feel and act however you please, and you do not owe anybody an explanation.
If you double text the boy you're crushing on and he calls you "too clingy," respectfully walk away. If constant communication is the way you express your affection, do not change for him (or anybody for that matter). You do not owe him an explanation for why you do what you do. He should respect the fact that you express your affection differently than he does.
If your best friend calls you "too dramatic," don't get angry with her. Some people have the ability to brush things off, and some people don't. Either way, it's okay. If you're the kind of person who feels things with all of your being or gets worked up easily, you should not have to apologize for that. You have the right to feel the way you do.
Whether you're complaining that you got a 90 on an exam instead of your usual 95 or the fact that you and your mom got into a fight before you left the house this morning; you deserve to be as dramatic as your heart desires. You should not have to tone yourself down for the people around you.
If your guidance counselor or advisor tells you that you are "too ambitious" when you tell them what you want to do with the rest of your life, do not be disheartened. Do you think that if people like Beyoncé, Bill Gates, and Steve Jobs weren't "too ambitious" that they would be successful? Without ambition, who would any of us be? Dream big. Whether you want to be a pop star like Beyoncé, a doctor, a lawyer, a teacher, an engineer, a technician, etc.; it is possible, regardless of how many people tell you that you can't. Anything is possible with hard work and ambition.
We all have that one boy who thought we'd be with forever. Whether you met him when you were 16 or 26, you will always remember the way you felt when he left- you were heartbroken. Everything around you reminded you of him; every song you listened to, every movie you watched, every time your phone lit up you hoped it was a text from him saying how badly he messed up and wanted you back. Maybe your parents said you were "too upset" and that there are other fish in the sea, but what if you thought he was your one and only? You have a right to be upset. You have a right to feel the pain. You have a right to sulk in that pain. That pain you felt? That is beautiful. That pain makes you human. That pain and hurt mean that that boy meant something to you- that you had somebody who enriched your life in ways you never thought possible. It's okay to be upset; do not allow anybody to tell you that you shouldn't be. We all have different ways of coping with loss.
Maybe being "too much" isn't so bad after all- it just means that you put your heart and soul into everything you do. Would you rather tread through life without ever really feeling anything? Or would you rather feel everything you possibly can as strongly as you can? Your time on this earth is precious and you shouldn’t waste it by just going through the motions- if you do, you'll regret it one day.
Love,
A girl who is proud to be "too much."
