You are the one loved one see as so strong. The one that everyone runs to. You are the shoulder to cry on. The one who sits silent and listens. The one with the right words and comforting hugs. I understand. I know how it is, because I am this person. Your phone is on maximum volume when you know your friends are going to be out in case they need you and you are asleep. You stay up no matter what the next day holds whether it is a final, prom ect. To hold your friends hair and make sure she gets to bed safe. You put off doing that paper that is due at midnight, or blow off the event you have been waiting for, for months to eat ice cream while they cry the person that broke their heart out of their system.
Why do you do it? Because it is so much easier to solve others problems than focusing on your own. Maybe because in our minds by helping her get through her break up, your broken heart will mend itself. Or you could just be so busy focusing on everyone else that you forget about yourself and your needs in that moment. It is easier to give advice, than take it and apply it to what you are going through,
You are going to exhaust yourself with the effort you apply in trying to “fix” everyone and everything. No matter how hard you try and how much you want to, you can not fix everyone and everything, and that is okay. Honestly, if you continue to carry everyone’s weight on your shoulders you are going to be hurting yourself. There is only so much one person can handle.
It is okay to take the day off from being the hero. Sometimes you are so focused on helping everyone else you don’t even realize that you are drowning. Taking a day for yourself, doing the things you like to do, is super acceptable to do and as much as you may think it is selfish, I promise you it isn’t. The people you are helping would want you to be okay yourself. So, hang up the cape for a day and cuddle under the blankets, binge watch a series on Netflix, listen to your favorite song, do your make up, curl your hair, whatever you need to do to focus on you and your own hapiness.
Take it from me, someone who has struggled with this personally , it is easy to lose yourself in the chaos. Just because you are the one everyone comes to for help, doesn’t mean you don’t need help yourself. You are allowed to have stay in bed all day because you can’t find the energy to get up out of bed. You don’t need to be laying in bed feeling lost and alone, you can lean on people for help like they do for you.You are the strong one. The go to person. But it’s okay to be the weak one sometimes. Just know you will stand back up.