Dear Senior Year Me,
It feels like forever ago, that I was a senior in high school, counting down the days until graduation. High school was hard for you. You could not wait to graduate, and get away from an atmosphere you had become so accustomed to, but so tired of. Senior year for you was definitely full of stupidly immature drama. You just kept telling everyone that you "just wanted to graduate" and you "couldn't wait to leave." Everyone always responded with "high school is going to be some of the best years of your life!" or that "when you leave, you are going to miss high school." While they were partially right, they were also very wrong. It is true that separation can make the heart grow fonder, but it can also make the heart realize that it never needed the things it thought it wanted. There are certain aspects of high school you miss, but definitely not everything. You miss your favorite teachers who put up with a lot of your crap, because they wanted to see you succeed, but most of whom are going to leave during the next summer to teach in different districts. You miss your journalism department because its the only place you always felt at home in that school, and it was a source of true success for you. You miss living at home, and being with in arms reach of family at all times. You miss the feeling of having a support system of people that are like a net beneath your feet, ready to catch you if you fall. When you go to college, that support net is always there, you just have a bigger distance to fall before you hit the net. High school is not supposed to be the "best years of your life" and you will find out while in college, that there are people from your graduating class who definitely peaked in high school. You are lucky to not be one of those people.Your life has not really begun yet. You are going to graduate high school and go to college, and everything will start to feel like its finally falling into place. You are going to find out that, even though you spent all of high school trying to find your identity, you have known who you are as a person all along. You will be proud of the decisions you made your senior year, even though some of them caused unnecessary drama. You were right to not be best friends with the popular girls. You were right to put all of your time and energy into your broadcasting and journalism classes you loved. You were right when you figured out that your favorite teachers will always be cooler and smarter than the stupid "cool kids." You have so much life ahead of you. Everything from this point of senior year on, is going to be so exciting and scary. It is going to test your strength and sanity, but in the end, everything will be worth it.Though you constantly felt like you didn't fit into your surroundings or into a specific friend group, you are going to go away to college and find out who truly was worth being friends with. You will make so many wonderfully new friends, and find your best friends. You will meet all kinds of characters at college, who will fuel your comedic fire. In high school, you felt as if you always had people who always wanted to stop you from succeeding, or defer you in any way possible. Unfortunately, it seems as though you will always have these people in your life. Don't let these energy vacuums stop you from taking life by stride. Use these people as motivation to further yourself and push you to reach your goals.
During senior year, you were extremely head strong and passionate about your choices, even when others told you they were wrong. You are luckily smart enough to know that this one feature that you should never change, because passion and drive are what cause people to change the world. You may feel small right now, but little you has the potential to make a big impact in the world. Never forget that you are continuing your education with college in the hopes of one day changing the world, even in the slightest way.
You currently think your mom has gone crazy, because you have fought with her more in the last year, than every before in your entire life. Let me tell you: she has gone crazy, but it is for the right reason. Senior year causes parents to lose their minds for a little bit. They are realizing that their baby is no longer a baby, and that they are going to soon be leaving the house to live their life a little more independently.
You have felt like you were a "real adult" for a little while now, but you have still been pretty dependent on your parents; living at home, asking for food money every once in a while, having your parents pay for things you need. When you graduate, you are basically taking the next step into being an actual adult. Even though you will not be all the way there yet, this is hard for your parents. Even though they have complained about how much you nag them for things or how much money they continuously have spent on you, up until this point they have always felt needed. When you graduate and go to college, you will push your new found independence. You won't be living under their roof anymore, or eating the food they cook for you. You will still be asking them for food money, or to pay for random things, but you aren't an arms reach away anymore. Your parents are starting to realize this and it is scary for them.
So be a little understanding, will ya? I'm not saying stop fighting with Mom all together, because where is the fun in that. Just keep in mind that the mommy bird is sad because her baby is about to leave the nest to test out her wings for flying. Besides, when you go to college, you will meet friends through sharing horror stories of the things your parents said or did during your senior year.
Up to this point, life has felt like a constant battle. You are fighting against people, school, sports, time management, stress, negativity and people constantly doubting you. While these battles never stop, you will learn ways to deal with these small road bumps. People are always going to doubt you no matter what you do. This is good for you though, because it gives you all the motivation you need to prove them all wrong.
As you approach graduation, and the stress of completing the Senior Video, speaking at Baccalaureate, or planning your grad party start to ware on you, keep pushing yourself and don't give up, but also chill out. Remember that you have many people who love and support you, and are willing you help you in any way. The Senior Video is going to turn out amazing and will cause people to cry. Baccalaureate is going to be a fun learning experience. Your grad party will be amazing with all the help you will get, and you will see so many people that you haven't seen in years.
Remember to take mental pictures of everything you experience in these next few months. you will want to remember all of this in the future and learn from your mistakes.
Sincerely,
A very proud, college sophomore you.
