Dear You,
I must have done something very right (or maybe very wrong, depending on how one looks at it), because I am almost positive that to this day, you never knew how I felt about you. I was a “misfit” of sorts who never had the confidence to speak up about her feelings. You were the smart athlete who I never really saw myself being able to “wow." I tried very hard to avoid developing real feelings for guys in high school, but you were the exception to this.
Being in college now, and looking back, I am realizing more and more that high school is absolutely the weirdest time to like someone. In middle school, it was all innocent and awkward, but it didn’t feel awkward because everyone was going through the same thing. In high school, though, everyone is at a different point in their life, in terms of their maturity level. Sometimes, that causes people to regret the crushes they once had. Not me, though.
I could go on for days about your great qualities. Your effortless intelligence and wit, your mesmerizing charm, your sparkling eyes that I could get lost in for hours, just to name a few. But I think what attracted me to you the most was your drive and ambition to succeed in everything you did. You worked so hard to be the best you could be, and that was something that I never overlooked. Did I ever tell you any of this? No way. I spent almost two and a half years crushing from afar, and watching you like and date girls that I was friends with. I was never sure what to do with my feelings that I had toward you. I knew toward the end of our high school days that I shouldn’t bother mentioning it. I didn’t want to make things weird, especially because we were around each other a lot.
Fast forward to the present. We go to college in different states, but much to my surprise, we still talk on occasion. Maybe even more than we did in high school. I mean, there is no denying that we have things in common, and I feel like there are things you get about me that others don’t, which is a really good feeling to have. I love our conversations, and I like that talking to you brings back memories that I sometimes forget about.
So here’s to the guy that I belted out Taylor Swift’s “You Belong With Me” in dedication to, the guy that instantly made my nerves go wild when I saw him while walking down the hallway, and most of all, the guy who I still smile about whenever he pops up in my mind. I hope for nothing but the best for you, because you deserve it. You taught me so much about myself, and I think the world of you. That will never change.
From the bottom of my heart,
Alexis
