Since day one, I’ve been a daddy’s girl. Anything he said or did was pure gold in my eyes; he’s my hero. I cherished every moment I had with him, from our weekly adventures to the mall, to feeding the swans by his side at the local park. My time with him was sacred, and as a little girl I constantly wanted his full attention.
Needless to say, I was slightly alarmed when he started bringing some lady around all of the time to hang out with us. She was beautiful, kind, loving, and an incredible cook, yet her consistent presence during daddy-daughter time made my six year-old brain question if I approved of her or not. Soon enough, she became my stepmom, and my whole world changed. I may have lost my life alone with my dad, but with her, I gained the best bonus I could ever ask for.
Dear Bonus Mom,
Contrary to Cinderella’s story, I can conclude that not all stepmothers are evil. In fact, you, Bonus Mom, are one of the best people I’ve ever known. The day that you and Dad got married, we became a family of the highest caliber. Before the wedding I was reluctant to relinquish my role as queen of the household, yet soon after, I realized that your marriage was the greatest blessing. You are the cement that holds this family together, and you shaped me into the woman I am today.
Since the moment you came into my life, you’ve taken me in as your own. From baking me my own personalized shaped cakes every birthday I celebrated, to listening to me cry about my nasty middle school peers, you were my very own Wonder Woman. Even when you gave birth to my amazing two brothers, nothing changed. I was still your daughter. The three of us became five, and your love for me was strong as ever. Although you did not give birth to me, there has not been a single moment that I have not felt like your little girl. That has meant more to me than you will ever know.
As expected, we have our differences. Sometimes we butt heads, scream at each other, cry, and get on each other’s nerves. We can be so stubborn, like mothers and daughters often are, yet I don’t mind it. I never mean any of the stupid things I say to you when I’m angry, and the only reason we fight is because we care so much about each other. You didn’t let me go to that party during my junior year of high school because you wanted to keep me safe. You scolded me when I dated that boy because you knew how horrible he was, and you knew that I deserved better treatment than what I was settling for. I might have been furious during those times, but your words and actions truly touched my heart in a way that I was not aware of at the time. You have always loved me enough to care.
Alas, I need to thank you. Thank you for allowing me to be your first child, even though I am not yours by birth. Thank you for becoming a member of my family and for bringing me to the beach every summer to make me a part of yours. Thank you for lifting me up when I’m down and for finding me when I’m lost and afraid of what might be. Thank you for molding me into a kind, strong-willed woman. Thank you for supporting me and always pushing me to be the strongest, most confident version of myself. The lessons you have taught me will remain in my head and in my heart for the rest of my life. Lastly, thank you for loving me unconditionally. You have filled a void in my life that no one else could, and you have left a permanent handprint on my heart.
“Stepmother” is not the right term to describe the role you play in my life. While you’re not my biological mother, there is no one more worthy of that significance and more. I’m so lucky that you’re my Bonus Mom, and I will love and treasure you forever.
